Ranked in ascending order of foulness, as usual:
- Your ex-wife / ex-husband, accompanied by someone much better-looking than you
- Four old girlfriends / boyfriends (bonus points if it’s your wedding reception)
- A vegan-only buffet
- An Irish folk band on stage
- An alcohol-free bar
Your contributions in Comments.
Toast by the bridegroom’s father: “First came the engagement ring. Then came the wedding ring. Now comes the suffering.”
I once attended an alcohol-free reception. I actually almost expected it since the bride is something of a blue-nose. It was an outdoor ceremony, sitting in the sun, hotter than Hells Bells, and when I went inside and asked for a beer I was told no alcohol was served. Not even a cash bar. The toast was done with sparkling apple cider.
For what it’s worth, the happy couple were not, to my knowledge, recovering alcoholics, that would be sort-of understandable.
My cousin had a wedding like that. The bride and the bride’s family were about as close to pure American-Indian ancestry as you get these days. The lack of alcohol was to prevent fights.
I’m kind of partial to Irish folk bands, so can’t agree with that.
How about a stripper coming out of the wedding cake for entertainment – and she recognizes you.
“I’m kind of partial to Irish folk bands”
PDW, you go stand in the corner, saying filth like that on this website…
Oops. I almost posted as did pdwalker, though, of course, I was thrilled when my eldest had some Merle Haggard, Waylon Jennings and David Allan Coe at his wedding reception (in Dallas, by the way).
There was NOT an alcohol-free bar………………as God would intend!!
David Allan Coe? Yer son has excellent taste in Outlaw Country.
Sing along: I was drunk, the day my Mom, got outa prison……
Had it on an 8-track…..
Actually, I specifically remember that was on the list – much singing along…………… (good times)
> A vegan-only buffet
Nobody who does this would invite me to their wedding.
watching one of my relatives (sober) performing the kazatska a la Peter Lorre in “Silk Stockings”…
Alcohol…Free…Bar. Nope, I know what all the words mean, but I just can’t get them to make any sense strung together like that.
At my cousin’s wedding, the bride’s mother invited her daughter’s previous boyfriend, danced with him instead of the groom, and to cap this performance toasted the groom by regretting the groom wasn’t as good a prospect as “the one my daughter let get away.”