We’ve all done it, but here are the worst, in ascending order of ridiculousness:
- I have to leave now, it’s Happy Hour at the Rose & Crown
- I have to pick my grandmother up at the airport (bonus if the speaker is over the age of 50)
- I have to get to the liquor store before it closes
- I broke my fingernail and I have an emergency appointment at the nail salon (female; if male, I don’t want to talk to you)
- I have to take my Mom to the maternity ward
Bonus points for guessing which one was mine.
Your suggestions in Comments.
The laxative just kicked in
I got “it” caught in my zipper
I have to bring my car to the mechanic (when everyone knows you don’t drive)
My wife just called to tell me she’s fertile NOW
I have to go to a Hillary Clinton rally
Kim, everyone here should know that the happy hour excuse was yours.
All of the above.
The range is empty at this time of the afternoon.
The funny part being that my boss would say, “Great idea. Got a second gun with you?”
My Prius just went over 5,000 miles on the way to work and I have to get my oil changed and rotate my tires before I make the ten mile drive home.
“I have to get to the liquor store before it closes”
As an employer, I’d consider that a completely valid reason for leaving early.
“There is a youtube celebrity doing a signing of his new adult coloring book and I already spent $100 on tickets to it.”
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is giving a one hour lecture on “Paleswinians and the Gaza Greenhouses; Trading Food for Scrap Metal”, and I don’t want to miss that!
I’ve got to tee off before the golf league gets there.
And, yes, I’ve used it.