As Week 2 of self-isolation begins, we go Full Absurd:
And stuff like this happens when you have to endure self-isolation:
…and the offending article:
and from Britishland:
Ground Zero:
Now, a test:
Question: If you had a choice from whom you’d rather contract coronavirus sickness after six hours of bed-bending sex, which of the following potential partners would you choose?
Okay okay okay… that was just a sample set of choices. Here are the REAL choices:
Option #1 (Classy):
Option#2 (Home Girl):
Option#3 (MILFY):
Option #4 (Cutie-Pie):
Hint: there are no wrong answers. However, if your final choice is from the Sample set of pics, go and stand in the corner with the “Pervo” hat on.
As for the samples, Coronavirus is the least of your worries, you’d catch something they haven’t NAMED yet, let alone found a cure for. Not to mention they all look batshit crazy. There’s nice crazy (she meets you at the door wearing your shirt from yesterday with nothing underneath) and stay-away crazy (she meets you at the door wearing your old girlfriend’s skin with nothing underneath).
The second set are all cute, but all skinny for my tastes (although I imagine #3 could take you places). Now Christina Hendricks or Sofia Vergara, I may die WITH Coronavirus, but the cause of death would be sexual overexertion.
Where’s the Kim we know and love? Of those four beauties, there’s not a pneumatic bust or a British-style heavy leg among them.
And the correct answer is #4, although you probably won’t go wrong with #1, either.
Sheesh… when I try to provide a little variety, I get slammed with “Where’s the big tits at?”
You guys are worse than I am.
Sorry, I should have been clearer. Your choices here are exactly the type I prefer. Thank you. I was just, perhaps facetiously, concerned about your sudden switch to slender women.
That said, I keep looking back at that camper woman in the pink and green. There’s a lost afternoon there, I think.
She’d just call you Dearie all afternoon.
Let’s see…Skanks vs expensive prostitutes who are all younger than my daughter? I don’t think there is an option there that avoids the Pervo hat.
Damn… you avoided the trap.
“However, if your final choice is from the Sample set of pics, go and stand in the corner…”
Yeah, but you could have all three for the the price of just one of the others.
.
So you’re a “quantity over quality” kinda guy, huh?
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
“Wuhan Funeral Parlor…and Deli”. You left that last bit out!
As for the femmes, home-girl. Though if I had to choose from the sample platter, #3. She’s young, and I’m pretty sure her get-up is a costume (including the hair).
From the corner [proudly]!
Sample #1 only…don’t care for the cigarette breath.
…and in addition, all subsequent Options from #1-#4….just the thought of getting it from any and all. Mmmmmmm. Pass the Hydroxychloroquine please. Keep the anti-perv drugs.
Which one doesn’t matter, Kim, as I would expire by hour 4.