The best thing about November is that it’s no longer October — the latter being the OMG It’s Halloween! season. Let it be known that I hate Halloween: stupid horror movies all over TV, fucking pumpkin-flavored everything (coffee? FFS), “scary” decorations on everything, including rotting pumpkins… it’s enough to make one go
The only decent part of Halloween is that totties get dressed up in costumes (“fancy dress” to non-Murkins). Even that, though, can be a mixed blessing, as the pics below reveal:
Pro tip: dressing up like a hooker is not cute when you actually are one. Then there’s the mother/daughter idea:
Frances Furter?
And finally:
Oh wait… that last one is neither a totty nor a Halloween costume: it’s F1 driver Lewis Hamilton, in all his self-conscious totally-gay wokeness.
A little tail of the tiger might not be too bad. Neither would the devil with her dog.
Happy Halloween!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LB_aegewceU&fbclid=IwAR0h7Dj_NeWEmEEF36diX288mwiIUQylT_fleC1p5AUVan5PpXpRaznrXEA
I need to send Kim an invite to a sci-fi/fantasy convention or two 🙂
Yes, you get the women (and men) who have foolishly attempted to squeeze into lycra two sizes too small. Price of admission, in my opinion. Then you’ll run across some fine lass who has DEFINITELY put in the time — both in costume and in body — to do it right.
Hopefully DragonCon 2021 won’t get cancelled like this year’s was.
Sending me such an invitation will be absolute proof that you hate me.
Ah well, no hard feelings 🙂
Ms. Op-Art has the focal points all wrong.
Is it OK yet to call Lewis Hamilton “Camp Louie” yet? I don’t care what the fashion is, or what the salesman told you in the store, that is not a color a man with dignity wears.
I was at a Trump Truck Rally in El Paso (he seems REALLY popular here, going to be interesting Tuesday) and they had a Trunk or Treat gala (against the wishes of our “esteemed county judge”. Everyone pretty much said fuck the restrictions. Two VERY cute young ladies were escorting a young girl in a Scooby Doo outfit. The young ladies did honors to Velma and Daphne, right down to the bright colors of their clothes. Should have gotten a picture but my wife would probably have thought I was being a perv.
Halloween used to be a nice smallish event for the kiddies. Trick-or-treat around the neighborhood, with the parents of the smaller kids chatting on the sidewalk while the littles rang the doorbells. But there seems to be an industry dedicated to making sure that you have to park in your driveway because the garage is full of Holiday Decoration Tchotchkes (extra large size). It started with Christmas. Halloween was next, followed by generic Fall nonsense (what the @##&! is a scarecrow doing in a suburban development?). Last year I noticed they were moving in on Valentines Day. I suppose July 4 is next, and probably Arbor Day (inflatable singing trees, anyone?).
I am a fan of Absolutely Fabulous and I always got a huge laugh out of the antics Eddie and Pats got up to on the show…but I didn’t realize how realistic a portrayal it was of your average UMC Brit femme. I know the best comedy is that which is close to reality, but Ab Fab didn’t even have to exaggerate for effect.
The person in the purple satin looks like a tranny.
I tolerate Halloween for my children’s sake. We dutifully follow them through the neighborhood, chaperoning their efforts to collect junk food from the nice people in town. Some of my neighbors take it as yet another excuse to drink like it’s TEOTWAWKI, again. I don’t partake so my party-pooper self doesn’t get invited to parties. That’s ok, because I follow Jocko’s advice to stay prepared, and I’m bed at 2100 so I can hit the gym by 0500, and I was there this morning right on time.
In any case, I’m glad it’s over. I will truly celebrate with something special on Wednesday morning. Alcohol-free salty libruhl tear martinis sound delish as a post-election day beverage.
I like Halloween for the kids sake. For the past few years, I have been the candy-giver for my mother. My wife and I live in the country and don’t get trick-or-treaters, because there are only a few houses per mile on our road. But my mom lives in a subdivision and there, trick-or-treaters are legion. My mom and I sit on the front porch swing and wait for them to come by.
I actually love doing it.
Starting at about sunset, the real little ones, you know, the toddlers and preschoolers, come out with their parents. Most of the costumes are adorable. After it gets dark, the older kids, the ones about 7 to 12 come by. (Their parents are there but mostly stay at the street.) These older kids, especially the girls, can be really entertaining because you can play minor pranks on them. Last night we had a really cute girl come by, about 10 or 11 years old, who was dressed up as a ballerina.
“Trick-or-treat.” says she.
“Okay. Trick!” says I. (The look of consternation on her face was priceless.)
“Huh?” she says?
I said “Trick. Show me a trick.”
She said “Okay”, and proceeded to do a magnificent toe-up pirouette.
I laughed, told her that was great, and gave her a whole handful of candy. She went away laughing.
We had one boy, about the same age, who did a hand-stand for us. He got a big handful as well and he too went away laughing.
We are always generous with the candy which lasted till almost 9:00 PM. But by that time things had wound down. The last group that came by, we gave them all that was left and then turned off the porch light.
My mother always gets a kick out of the kids – and my antics. She is 90 years old this month, so there won’t be very many more of these left for her. I will continue to do this as long as she wants me to. And indeed, when she is gone, this is one of the things I will really miss.
Got a little dusty in here suddenly, didn’t it?
When I was a youngster, we always gave out candy, and lots of it, because my folks were unleashing up to ten candy monsters on the world and we needed to keep the Cosmic Balance.
For over sixty years, except when I was overseas, we always gave out candy, lots of it, no matter what, until it was gone.
Not this year, though. We are three over-70 geezers, each with an assortment of those “secondary” ailments that will help the China Virus kill you. There weren’t many kids that came through the neighborhood anyway, but it was sad to see our house was dark and our good neighbors weren’t sharing Halloween Margaritas on the driveway.
By the way, the only high point Saturday night: someone stole my neighbor’s Biden-Harris sign. It was only a little one, but she wanted to report it to the local law as a hate crime.
Eh, stealing political yard signs is like putting Icy-Hot in your big brother’s jock strap: funny, but still wrong.
Lockdown and bad weather meant few people were out, and nobody came to my door.
Halloween has turned from a kid’s night to score some candy into some sort of redneck pseudo-Christmas extravaganza for stunted adults.
I don’t think it’s just rednecks. Or even mostly rednecks. They may have the most labor intensive Halloween displays, but the store-bought stuff turns up all over yuppiedom.
A little late to the party, but I post this every Fall on FB:
Be it proclaimed:
Whereas: pumpkin is a fine gourd, containing many nutrients beneficial to life, and
Whereas: the aforementioned pumpkins can be spiced and made into a pie which is the Platonic ideal of a pie, meaning one which cannot be improved by warming it and adding a scoop of ice cream.
Be it resolved: despite its many attributes, pumpkin, with or without spice, has no place in either beer or coffee, both being beverages given to us by God in their perfect form (I.e. unadulterated by fruit, vegetables, or other flavors not a natural outgrowth of their respective brewing processes)
So do we proclaim.
Mark D