News Roundup

Bad News

The news, like Biden’s addled brain, is all over the place today.


…oh really?  Just wait till you try to pawn your vibrator when cash is tight, sweetie.


…I probably speak for quite a few people when I say, “No more.  Ever.”

And speaking of people we don’t want to see or hear from ever again:


…ah yes, hurricanes:  that deadly disease.


…yawn.


…and the word is “slew”, not the name of a noizee 70s Brit rock band.

This is the shocking moment an Orthodox Jewish man
is punched in the face by a passer-by in a ‘racist attack’
that left him unconscious – just hours after a child was
attacked nearby.
…let’s all play “guess the passer-by’s race”, shall we?


…and only the U.S. State Department was surprised by this news item.


…we’re just trying to keep them feeling at home, right?

And speaking of disgusting:


…not that I would want to be in the same zip code as any of them anyway.


…everyone knows you never go Full Jesus.


…and she looks about how you’d expect her to look.

Total Suckage Department:

     


…why did this headline make me giggle like a schoolgirl?

And now, INSIGNIFICA:

 

And yet another sign that the Apocalypse is nigh:


…non-alcoholic Guinness.  Jaysus wept.

Here’s Logan’s Run  star Jenny Agutter:

18 comments

  1. Isn’t the primary advantage of Guinness over food that while consuming too much of both might make you fat, at least Guinness gets you drunk? (I do happen to enjoy how it tastes while drinking it, but there’s no point without the medicinal benefits).

  2. re. David Morris.

    Serial (def.) (of a criminal) repeatedly committing the same offense and typically following a characteristic, predictable behavior pattern.

    He killed all his victims in the same night. Isn’t that more of a mass murderer type thing rather than a serial killer type thing?

    1. And he wasn’t tied up, either. What the hell was that about? Why would you tie a dead man’s hands together before burying him? This was an insanely stupid stunt by any standard, but what kind of pastor doesn’t even know what the Bible actually says?

      1. You tie them up so when they rise in search of the blood of the living, they can’t dig their way out of the ground.

  5. I enjoy reading funny shit Kim posts here and today’s ‘Soap Dodgers’ was excellent.

    “Mila added: “I don’t wash my body with soap everyday. I wash pits and tits and slits and holes and soles.”

    That caused a deep belly laugh and reading about all of the other Cinema Slobs was delightfully disgusting. Best to stay upwind of those folk.

    1. You have to ask if she’s gone to all that work on her orifices, why not just spend an extra couple minutes doing the rest?
      On the other hand, she IS Ukranian.

      1. I saw her in a movie, kind of naked, about a month ago and her little self has some rather nice bits and parts but she is married to that big goober Ashton Kutcher who might find her a bit more snug than old Demi.

  6. My sympathies are with the farting boss. He was no doubt firing a lazy waiter.

    A farting horse will never tire,
    A farting man’s the man to hire.

    Ancient wisdom, now mostly lost.

  8. I saw Logan’s Run in the theater, WITH MY PARENTS, at age 13.

    They made much of Farrah being in the movie, but Jenny definitely stole the show.

    Time for a cold shower.

    Mark D

  9. “…let’s all play “guess the passer-by’s race”, shall we?”

    I know what you were getting at here, but Muslim is not a race.

    Hang on a minute . . . is Nigella Lawson slut-shaming herself?

  12. Yeah, I still remember the outfit Jenny wore in “Logan”; especially when she came out of the big waterfall…

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