I almost, but not quite had a Red Cloud Of Blood (RCOB) moment when I saw this little piece of snot:
The biggest automaker in the world is reportedly working on an electric vehicle prototype that mimics the feel of driving a manual transmission, complete with a gear shift that’s not connected to anything and a floor-mounted speaker to pipe in fake engine noises. The car will even pretend to stall out if you fumble the controls — in order to deliver drivers the complete experience of driving a manual car.
…in other words, turning their already-shit cars into the automotive equivalent of a RealDoll.
Here’s my thought on the matter: what with the Kardashians, CNN and Gavin Newsom (to name but some examples), I think we’ve got all the fake shit we need around here.
The thing that stopped me from a full-blown RCOB and made this just a Tut-Tut Moment was the recollection that I’m never going to own or even drive an electric car, ever. It would be like Macy’s announcing that they’re going to be selling onion-flavored toffee — nauseating, yes; but I never shop at Macy’s, I’m not in the toffee market, and am therefore unaffected.
And as for a “gear shift that’s not connected to anything”, I can think of no better description of Joe Biden.
I own and drive almost daily an EV. I like it. It’s reliable, comfortable, relatively cheap to operate, quiet, and safe.
Which is what I want from a car.
I can fully understand car makers trying to please customers who want the feel of a manual but are mandated by government idiocy to buy automatics. What surprises me is that this is an issue in the US where people have been buying automatics almost exclusively for decades.
The Porsche Taycan EV actually does have a 2 speed Transmission, but the shift is imperceptible and happens at a low speed. This reeks of some non car guy marketing person who’s never driven a manual transmission car and commutes daily by subway to his Toyko office. I don’t really even hear anybody complaining about their computer controlled PDK transmissions anymore.
Having driven a manual car for 40 years, I can enjoy driving our cars without a clutch pedal and not feel deprived somehow. It took some time for people to get used to the idea that they didn’t need a Buggy Whip a well.
….. and there is no government mandate for an automatic transmission. It’s a market driven mandate. Manual cars were initially cheaper than the optional automatics, but the automatics vastly outsold the manuals so automatics became the default configuration.
“It’s a market driven mandate.”
Except – except – except –
Automatic trannies can be tuned to better perform on the govt mandated emissions and MPG testing. Manuals? Who knows how the end client will operate it? Thus you end up with shit like some modern performance cars (I believe Dodge Challenger, not 100% sure) that have electronic lock-outs on their 6 speed manuals that forces you to skip lower gears if you aren’t at full acceleration.
So yes, the govt isn’t directly forcing auto makers to move toward automatics, but indirectly it kinda is. In much the same way that mandated car seats and truck-vs-car mileage standards doomed the station wagon and brought about the mini-vans.
As for the buying public, on most normal vehicles (mommy mobiles, commuters, etc.) people do want automatics for the ease of driving. Who wants to sit in bumper to bumper stop-n-go traffic with a clutch pedal? But for performance cars the enthusiasts still want that slam shifting action. It’s a niche market, but it’s still there.
Automatic trannies vs. manual trannies! Trannie, Trannie, Trannie! That’s all I’m hearing these days.
F’Gawd’s sake! Enough with tall his woke stuff already.
Enough with all this woke stuff already
Sorry. I think I’m ready for a new keyboard, or new fingers, or both.
I’ll disagree with the notion that ” enthusiasts still want that slam shifting action”. Performance driving is all about not upsetting the “Balance” of the car. Brutally shifting from one gear to another will cause unwanted weight transfer. This type of shifting was born from a misunderstanding of the concept of speed shifting. Rapid shifting from gear to gear is advantageous because you want a contiguous application of power. and nothing is faster or smoother than a modern computer controlled dual clutch transmission. A “Flappy Paddle Gearbox” as described by some overweight English dude who seems to have finally accepted the concept.
The other reason for a preference for a manual is that they provide some braking force when the throttle is released. A transmission that includes a Torque converter instead of a clutch will “Freewheel” when the power is no longer applied. The ability to change and control the balance of the car by controlling the weight transfer using the throttle is best done when the car is not “Freewheeling”. Electric cars use regenerative breaking to create the same effect. Under normal sane driving conditions you really don’t notice the effect, it only shows up as you approach the limits of control when driving on a track.
99.9% of the people who buy performance cars have ZERO interest in “performance driving”. They do, however, have an interest in revving the engine, smoking the tires, doing quick zero-60 take-offs and generally showing off in front of people stuck in Accords and Camrys.
Yes, you’re right about smooth shifting when turning laps at or near the limit of the car. But we’re more talking about cars that will never ever see a race track.
Toyota’s current and Toyota’s previous CEO who retired both said going ALL EV is NOT going to happen.
Toyota is one of the few Automakers who committed to still making gas powered, hybrid gas and electric and EV vehicles. Many automakers are pushing more and more for all EV.
I never learned to drive a standard, but I know a couple of people I work with who enjoy them. One coworker of mine has an older Toyota Yaris with a standard transmission.
I think it is silly to simulate a gas powered car on an EV, but there must be something to it. Think of all of the young fools who will play video games where guns are used, but these same fools won’t actually fire a real gun in real life.
Remember that movie Demolition Man with Sandra Bullock and Sylvester Stallone? The future has virtual reality sex because exchanging bodily fluids is dangerous? The liberals and climate nuts are taking a que from that I think, driving a car that feels like a car, but it is a computer on wheels.
Overall, I think Toyota is one of the best auto makers. I really enjoy my Rav4. It is a great vehicle. And like you Kim, I definitely do NOT want an electric vehicle and I am only in my late 30’s.
But remember, Toyota is cashing in on all of these fools that want sex without an orgasm, let Toyota separate fools and their money. Toyota is still going to also make REAL cars, aka, the gas powered ones for some time to come.
“turning their already-shit cars into the automotive equivalent of a RealDoll.”
Well, if you’re stuck in traffic and nothing’s moving …
This car comes with 17 cup holders, 3 latex vaginas, an auto-lube dispenser and tinted windows!
My 2 previous vehicles were sticks going back to 1983. My first car, in 1970, was a stick, so was my 2nd. I got a Blazer a couple years ago that has auto on the column and to this day I still find myself groping for the stick and raising my left leg to push the clutch out of habit. I miss the “connection” that a stick causes between the driver and the vehicle, sort of making them one. I swear I was always in better tune with my vehicle, aware of it’s sounds and performance, with a stick in my hand. I believe stick drivers are better drivers. I long for another stick. Preferably in a nice 60’s muscle car with a giant V8. (1969 Mach I)
I love rowing thru the gears, even in South Florida traffic. You will have to pry my ’17 Cadillac ATS-V 6 speed Tremec, ’37 Chevy Utility Express with Borg Warner T5 5 speed and ’55 Chevrolet 3100 with Muncie Rockcrusher 4 speed from my cold dead hands. With a manual transmission, you are actually driving. With an automatic, you are merely a steering and braking passenger.
You mean this isn’t satire?
They must be aiming for the Fast and Furious generation. I’m too old to have seen any of the movies, but the generation that grew up after me apparently thinks 4-cylinders are more than enough, down-shifting is like turbo boost, and cars routinely come with more than one reverse gear.
Mister Kim,
.
You are particularly lucid today.
Forwarded to everybody I know.
.
s,
LM
There was a period of time that we did not have a manual transmission car or truck in the house. Neither of us were very happy with that. The opportunity came to get a new pickup truck with a manual transmission so we did.
Usually when the gun grabbers get uppity I try to buy a couple of boxes of ammunition. With these EV dolts and such, what am I supposed to do? I can’t just get a spare engine or transmission to be stored in my garage until needed.
I have no interest in these glorified electric golf carts. They take too long to charge, charging stations are erratic to find, their range is terrible for my wants and needs, they randomly burst into flames, they are bad for the environment, bad for my wallet and the list of their liabilities continue from there.
JQ
Well spoken on the Biden thing.
The EV stick shift reminds me of the fuckwads who try to convince me that “Beyond Meat” patties tasted “just like real meat”.. You know what else tastes just like real meat. Real fucking meat.
” I think we’ve got all the fake shit we need around here.”
That started with automatic transmissions. As I am wont to say: “With rising illegitimacy and the widespread adoption of automatic transmissions, the Powers That Be have created a nation of shiftless bastards.”
There is one narrow way I’d buy a fully electric car–if I have to go back to working in an office AND there are sufficient HOV lanes between my house and the office AND there are dedicated EV parking spots. Then I’d buy a used Nissan Leaf or similar.
I am probably going to buy a Hybrid later this year or next year. I live outside of Denver, and I like to go up in the mountains, and electric motors are better in the really thin air at low speeds.
However I’m also going to get a cheap car (looking for a Suzuki SX4) with a manual transmission to teach Spawn how to drive a stic.