Ones you’d like to see, in Comments. Will not be moderated or censored.
Update: Damn, after reading some of y’all’s comments, I feel like a big wussy by comparison.
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Comments are closed.
Ones you’d like to see, in Comments. Will not be moderated or censored.
Update: Damn, after reading some of y’all’s comments, I feel like a big wussy by comparison.
Comments are closed.
“Donald Trump Re-Elected to President”
“Kamala Harris forgets to take off knee pads before taking stage to concede 2024 election”
“Joe Biden indicted for accepting bribes”
“Hunter Biden overdoses on Chinese Fentanyl”
“US Government drastically cuts budget, welfare and many social programs along with unneeded government spending stopped, protestors who demand more free stuff beaten in the streets by the working mob”
“The View TV show cancelled, Whoopie and others unsure as to what project comes next”
“Hillary Clinton arrested on charges of treason, backup server found with copies of 30,000 emails”.
“US Supreme Court declares all firearms laws are unconstitutional. Liberals upset and say common sense lost.”
“Stand your ground law passes at federal level”
Followed by
“After more Americans arm themselves, violent crime drops by 90 percent. Many criminals could not be reached for comment”
And
“Illegal immigrants who recently crossed border and tried to rob 80 year old lady were shot. Lady says the 2nd amendment is a blessing, the alleged robber could not be reached for comment, ET did not phone home.
435 Mysterious Large Greasy Spots In The Parking Lot Of The US Capital
===============
Puddles were sparking and fuming and emitting an obnoxious vapor.
-Trump takes office, swears upon bible to dutifully execute all constitutional duties (and means it)
-Gibbets erected before Capitol steps
-Entire DC judicial system shut down and fired, Texas itinerant judges brought in to resume court operations
-All J6 detainees released, records expunged and invited to report for local jury duty
-90% of congressional representatives suddenly resign for health and family reasons
-Blue states quarantined for contagious mental illness virus, told to shelter in place
-Expedited trials begin for all in government that failed to uphold oath of office
-Mass deportation of illegal aliens commences concurrent with border barriers being completed
-Unfortunate series of accidents appear to befall the Iranian Government leadership
-Moscow suddenly decides to negotiate for end of actions in Ukraine
“Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton and assorted aids and staff reported for prison yesterday to begin life internment or ride the lightning on ole sparky”
“McCarthy like trials wrap up with unprecedented amount of politicians, bureaucrats and staffers receiving sentences from time in the public stocks to dancing at the end of a rope”
“SCOTUS overturns NFA 1934, GCA 1968, machine gun ban from 1986, import ban of 1986 and all other infringements on the second amendment. In related news, Alan Gottlieb, Larry Pratt and others announce a much deserved semi retirement. Wayne LaPierre unavailable for comment from prison”
“XL Pipeline celebrates ten years with no spills or other accidents. Wildlife flourishes in the area”
“ANTIFA, BLM, Hamas supporters convicted of criminal behavior under the RICO statutues. Parent’s rejoice at getting their basements back as the criminals report to prison”
“Saudi officials perplexed as Mecca and Medina became giant craters. Al Queda spokesman reports their last bomb makers have not been heard from since their recent accidents”
“China, Cuba, Venezuela, North Korea, Vietnam successfully convince the racist Democrat death cult to abandon socialism as they have”
“Climate change “scientists” convicted of fraud and sentenced to 20 years in prison. Public outraged at short sentences”
“US Students become ranked number one in academics across the board once high standards for achievement have been reintroduced”
“Red Sox beat Yankees in playoff games to head to World Series again”
“Nigella Lawson announces torrid affair with Kim du Toit”
“Capping off ceremony to be held to celebrate the completion of the President Donald J Trump border security system”
Carol sues Nigella for alienation of affection.
All Men And Women Over 18 To Be Drafted – Those Unfit For Military Service To Be Sentenced To Two Years In Congress.
.
Asteroid hits New York, Manhattan Island destroyed, no survivors reported.
biological contamination prevents rescue effort, entire area declared an exclusion zone.
“Russia Threatens to Nuke All Major Cities in US; President Trump Says Go Ahead, We’ll Be Better Off Without ’em.” (“Dems Worried About Losing 100% of Parasite and Government ‘Worker’ Voting Base.”)
“President Trump Issues Executive Order Revoking ALL Previous EO’s back to George Washington.”
“President Trump Revokes Entirety of Federal Register; Government Parasites Hardest Hit.”
“President Trump Eliminates 3/4’s of Cabinet Positions; Former Heads of Departments of ‘Education’, ‘Energy’, etc. Given 1 Year to Provide Plans for Dismantling and Firing Personnel.” (“All Section 8 housing to be immediately privatized and sold to current-date occupants; ‘If they don’t like it, they can leave’, says former department head.”)
“Department of Defense to be renamed as “Department of War’; ‘It’s about time we actually won one’, says new head of Joint Chiefs of Staff Kurt Schlichter.”
Hey, a guy can dream…
We had a far better record with a Department of War and a Department of the Navy than we have with a Department of Defense. And that includes demerits for the Indian Wars.
The Foregoing Is An Excellent Start!
Nancy Pelosi, AOC publicly gang raped and beaten to death by illegal immigrants in separate incidents.
Your saying someone would willingly fuck Nancy Pelosi? Her husband likely doesn’t even fuck her. Was that a male prostitute that her husband had a hammer fight with in the house?
I wouldn’t fuck Nancy Pelosi with Bill Clinton’s dick for practice.
AOC is a crazy big mouthed bitch, but she’s kinda cute.
Cthulu visits Washington DC; Eats Every Last Fucker in the Vicinity.
I think this has already happened and nobody noticed him replacing the entire population by his minions.
Nope. That would be an improvement.
Greggs opens Texas franchise – offers free sausage rolls to pensioners
6X exports beer to Texas – offers free pints to pensioners
UK repeals gun laws – UK citizens queue in an orderly fashion for 1911’s
Oh stop that. I’m already a bit in love with you…
DJT elected – Constitution reinstated
US Marshals arrest heads of CIA, FBI, BATFE and Dept of Education.
Hillary Clinton immolates herself at NPR headquarters.
Barry Soetoro goes Lorena Bobbitt on his Husband Big Mike and cuts off MANchelle’s penis.
North American Mental Hospitals overflowing with Liberals after historic meeting statement from newly elected Prime Minister Poilievre and President Trump.
Border sealed by U.S. military. Expulsion of millions of illegal immigrants underway.
“Senator Ted Kennedy resurrected and hired as the bus driver to transport the illegals immigrants back home. The planned route for the bus includes a few bridges over water…”
“Earthquake breaks the state of California off from the mainland as the state floats off into the ocean. Gavin NewSCUM unavailable for comment”.
“Hank Johnson repeats his concern — errrr, joke.”
“Alec Baldwin found guilty of Murder… sentenced to life in prison with two bunk mates named Tyrone and Bubba”.
“All legacy Media file for Bankruptcy as viewership drops like a rock”.
USA Cell phone network hacked by Chinese aka the CIA blaming another country. Car accidents rate drops by 90 percent.
Capitol uneasy as 600,000 men with rifles erect gallows on National Mall.
Dem leadership could not be reached for comment.
Court orders Obama to pay $50M to William Ayers for theft of intellectual property.
Obamas humiliated, have no comment as multiple Obama homes go on auction block.
Housing market crash in DC area after Trump eliminates 14 departments and agencies, thousands more unemployed after 20% Fed job RIF.
Only 20%? Milei did 45%, and counting.
That’s just the first week across the board. Much more to follow after some study. Some agencies (War Dept) may stay at that, no limits on the rest and will vary from agency to agency.
Epstein blackmail videos released with victims blurred out a bit.
Washington DC burned down by angry armed flashmob.
Biden family death sentences carried out.
Clinton family death sentences carried out.
Fauci death sentence carried out.
Nuclear strike on Mecca declared to be complete success.
Transgender round up and incarceration completed.
Drag Queens declared extinct, as last specimen in captivity dies.
Gaza declared free of Palestinians.
National Guard opens fire on Campus protestors. Again.
I could go on and on…
I’m clearly too kind-hearted for this thread.
I could do a couple of Brit-centric ones for you, if you like…
I did think of plenty but really couldn’t bring myself to post them. Let me, however, offer this:
The USA repents of its rebellion. Government is reformed on a parliamentary system with the House of Representatives as MPs and the Senate becomes a purely revising House. His Majesty King Charles appoints the Princess Royal as America’s first Governor General.
🙂
“numerous Pro Palestinian terrorist camp outs burst into flames on campuses across the country. Scores of eye witnesses report “I din see nuffin'” as firefighters get lost trying to find their way to fires. Good tasted and rational thought to blame. Film at 11″
Every building at Columbia University collapses after Jews march around University blowing rams horns.
Republicans in Congress grow new spines Vote to expel ‘The Squad’ Nancy Pelosi and others
Vote to impeach Joe Biden
Double murder at Clinton residence Former president found with penis cut off Bill and Hilary’s bodies entwined authorities believe they stranged each other
+1 fpr the Biblical reference.
Jennifer Tilly, Jacqueline Obradors and Rachael Ray pose for Hustler Magazine, baring all.
(Hey. A guy can dream right?)
Fingers crossed that this dream becomes a reality.
16th, 17th, 19th, 23rd, 24th, 26th Amendments repealed in toto. 2nd Amendment revised to remove militia clause. 14th Amendment revised to explicitly bar citizenship to children of non-citizens.
Obergefell overturned.
Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, WIC, TANF, SNAP, and AFDC repealed. 90% of Federally-owned lands to be ceded to citizens as compensation for benefits which will no longer be issued. Land may be developed or sold (to other citizens only) entirely at discretion of the new owners.
Wickard v. Filburn overturned.
Griggs v. Duke Power Co. overturned.
Affirmative Action, Title IX, and EEOC repealed. Declared un-Constitutional.
All Federal taxes repealed. Replaced with 5% National Sales Tax on end-user, retail sales only, plus 10% import tariff. Balanced budget amendment passed. 28th Amendment banning deficit spending passed with support of 45 States (CA, NY, IL, MA, ME voted against).
Department of Education abolished.
All officers of CIA/FBI/DHS/BATFE suspended without pay while Texas Rangers conduct criminal investigations of all parties.
All Federal Employees/Agencies audited.
“Audit Of Federal Reserve Bankers Recovers Missing 34T In Federal Debt, Public Gallows Recreated In Bronze As New National Park”
.
“Nancy Pelosi OnlyFans Account Suspended After New Allegations Of Fraud, All Four Subscribers Bewildered, Left Hanging”
.
“In A Strong Independent Decision, Former Barista AOC Announces Move To Cuba, Opens Activist Training Center, Immediately Strangled By Students”
.
“Surprise White House Shift Reduces Aid To Enemies, Skim-Scammers Fuming In Frustration”
.
“Fired 80M Government Workers Seek Real-World Employment As Tax-payers Shrug Indifferently”
.
“In A Desperate Move To Counter Near-Zero Interest, Ladies Basketball Invites Russian President Putin To Sing National Anthem, Stadium Packed, Standing Room Only, Fans Horrified By Shocking Lack Of Sandwiches”
.
“Sad News, Last Functional EV Rolls To Stop As Last Living EV Enthusiast Staggers Away Aimlessly”
.
“Staring At Mid-Day Sun Trendy New Fad, Tide-Pods So Yesterday”
.
“Failing Davo NWO Orders Extra Servings Of GMO Brawno For True Believers, Predictable Results, Crashing IQ Tests Reveal”
“Pandemic Mastermind Fauci Ordered To Testify Under Oath, Bible Explodes In Flames”
.
“Entire Crew Of Biden Impersonators Quit In Disgust, Secret Service Refuse To Acknowledge Doctor Jill”
.
“Hoping To Pull An O’Bama, Hopeful Doctor Jill Authorizes Ghost-Written Autobiography ‘Hope And Dementia’, Publishers Hope Hunter Not Mentioned”