From Reader Garry K.:
Kim, in your recent rant against minivans on your Splendid Isolation blog (“No It Isn’t“, November 18, 2024), I wonder why you have so much hatred against such vehicles?
When you played gigs, how did you get your gear to the gigs? Did you pile all of your gear (amp head, speaker bottom, guitar case, maybe a PA system, mic stands, etc) into a tiny 2-seater sports car? I’ll bet not! To me, such 2-seater “sports” cars are totally useless. Give me a minivan any day, as I HAVE used my minivans to haul musical gear to gigs, to go camping, to haul a bunch of folks to carpool to events, etc.
When I used to gig, I had a 1974 VW “Panel Van” (bought new) that looked something like this, except in a sort of pale bamboo yellow, with the same hinged side doors (rather than a single sliding one):
Basically, VW Brazil realized that poor people needed basic transportation, so they set up a production line to re-create the 1964 model, only with modern 1600cc engines. To say that the interior was spartan is to make Spartan look Byzantine.
…except of course that mine had no radio, no snazzy “Volkswagen” chrome logo, and certainly no way to open the windshield. Talk about frivolous.
The model was so popular that VW South Africa started to import them — and even with an import duty of 100% (!!), the cars cost, in today’s Bidenflation dollars, the equivalent of about $6,500 (ZAR950, back then). Brand new.
I drove “Fred” for about eight years, and put close to 200,000 miles on the odometer. Horribly abused and always overloaded, it only needed a new clutch at 85,000 miles (along with the usual perishables like tires and so on).
They were so popular in South Africa that VW stopped importing them after only a few years because these plain-Jane vans were eating their lunch, with little profit withal, and VW couldn’t move their “regular” vans (which had unnecessary luxury geegaws like sliding doors, disc brakes, seatbelts, a curved single-piece windshield and automatic transmission).
And that was with the band back in Seffrica. When the kids came along in the U.S., I did the full station wagon / minibus thing: several minivans, SUVs and a Chev Suburban, before moving on to SUVs like the Kia Sportage and then a couple of Tiguans such as I drive today.
But to return to Reader Garry’s point: it’s not a question of hating minivans. It’s just that I never had a chance to drive a two-seater sports car as my own personal vehicle. In fact, the sportiest car I ever “owned” (company car) was an early-model 2-door BMW 318i with a 5-speed stick shift, which I loved with a passion.
In other words, I never had a chance to indulge myself, whether in my yoot because I had to schlep a band’s worth of gear, or as an adult because of kids.
And now, in my later years, I’d love to own an impractical 2-seater, just about any 2-seater, but it seems unlikely that I’ll ever get to do so. It’s therefore with great longing that I talk about sports cars as much as I do; in the cold harsh light of day, though, they’re my unreachable dream.
What I do know is that if I were to win the Powerball, I’d own at least three, out of pure self-indulgence — because I’ve been the responsible one all my life, and I’d like to be irresponsible just once.
Just don’t ask me which three, because I’ll talk about them some other time.
The older full size vans (Think A Team) or the VW vans were cool looking and functional.
Minivans are like a modern car was cross bred with a van. FUGLY.
FUNCTIONAL as a Semen Demon hauler or if you have a large family.
EXPENSIVE
Some of the modern minivans like the Honda Odyssey and Toyota Sienna are upwards of 50 to 60 thousand dollars! Unless you have a shitload of crotch fruits (more than 2) or a large family where you take them all places all the time, why not just buy something functional like a truck or an SUV? Or a performance car if that is your thing (not mine I like SUV’s).
Old vans = Cool factor
New vans = Overpriced Semon Demon hauler
For the people saying they go to Home Depot or Lowe’s with a MINI van – WTF??? That is what a Truck or a real van is for. And if you just pick up the occasional thing at the depot, your SUV will do just fine.
we definitely need more base model cars, vans and trucks.
Turn the clock back sixty years or so. Visit a modest home in East Phoenix where I grew up. Parked in the driveway were my dad’s VW Bus (he owned two over the years because station wagons couldn’t carry the whole family), brother #1 drove a VW Combi, a six-pack pick-up version of the Bus with drop down sides, sister drove a red bug, Brother #2 drove a ’58 faded blue bug with a sliding rag top, brother #3 drove a blue Squareback which he eventually traded for a newer white Bug. We could have had our own dealership. Everybody loved them. They were easy to drive and maintain, economical, and were as good on the back roads if you weren’t in a hurry to get somewhere.
As a horny teenager, when I was providing transportation for three or four friends, my girlfriend would sit half on the driver’s seat and half on the passenger seat. Shifting into second or fourth gear was heaven!
You’ve got to stop making admissions about having lived a conventional life, Kim, and lusted for but never owned a two seater. One of the reasons I’ve read your blog since well before your several years off is because, compared to me, I’ve considered you an exotic.
However, I have owned several two seaters, all F-150’s which comfortably hold two adults when the center console is folded down. One even had a manual transmission with a floor shift. That was a fine truck. My current one has something like a paddle shift option. Shifting the lever down from D lets you select any one of the 10 gears and you can shift up or down by flicking a small toggle on the shift lever, just like in a Formula 1. Well, kinda like anyway.
I’ve had some hot two seaters. Scared the wife so bye bye. Give me 4 seaters and I will live longer. Course it is not adrenaline fueled but who’s counting.
I am a 50ish single man (one pony of a dog) who went and bought a second Ford Transit Connect (Tourneo Connect in Europe) before Ford could discontinue it. I love it. You drive like you’re in a truck, and the 4 cylinder almost (but not quite) makes you forget you really want a v6. Ford said that demand was too low, even though here in KY dealers were asking 5k above MSRP ever since COVID. I intend to baby mine for the next 20+ years if at all possible.
The first one? It went to my daughter. It’s had a few minor issues (it’s a Ford), but nothing crippling.