Talk about welcome news:
Danish campaigners are proposing to buy California from the United States and turn it into a territory of Denmark in response to Donald Trump‘s bid to acquire Greenland.
The ‘Denmarkification’ campaign says it seeks to crowdfund $1trillion to purchase the US state, after which it plans to instill it with Danish values and make the most of its sunny weather and resources.
Good luck with instilling any values — let alone Danish ones — into that cauldron of assholes, guys. Hell, if you could clean up L.A. and San Francisco alone, you’d be doing the world a favor.
At least the new Danish “settlers” would be used to over-priced real estate, and the current crop of Californians would welcome your free healthcare and rampant socialism. And don’t forget to include the cost of a wall around the place — we’ve had more than enough Californians infest the rest of the country, thank you.
And you Danes might as well forget speaking that throat-clearing stuff you call a language and learn to speak Spanish. Although that need may disappear soon, if you get your way:
Denmark’s immigration approach has been influenced by Right-wing parties for more than 20 years, with Mette Frederiksen, the prime minister and leader of the centre-Left Social Democrats, pursuing a “zero refugee” policy since coming to power in 2019.
The country of around six million people received 2,300 asylum requests last year.
“Last year, authorities granted the smallest number of residency permits to asylum seekers that we have seen in recent years,” Kaare Dybvad Bek, the immigration minister, said, calling the figure “historic”.
If you can do that in California… see the title of this post.
Keep the farmland, a couple of deep water ports and our military bases.
Maybe selling off San Francisco, Los Angeles, San Diego and Sacramento would be enough to fix that state
Two conditions on the sale. They have assume California’s debt and California’s share of the Federal debt, and they have to build a wall between California and sane America.
The Danes recently deported a woman married to a Danish military officer because he was deployed overseas and her visa only allowed her to be in the country when he was.
Why not just trade California for Greenland?
Proposal: Trade California for Greenland and Minnesota for the western parts of Canada. Move our naval bases and ports from California to the state of West Canada, and build some highways and railroads to connect everything.
This keeps us at 50 states, so we don’t have to buy new flags. Well, unless you live in California or Minnesota, and those people don’t seem like the type to own flags anyway.
I know the Danes are playing this as a joke, and don’t realize the bulk of the US would be happy to see Kalifornia go. If it cant slide into the Pacific ocean post-quake, this might be a nice “half-a-loaf” solution.
I was going to ask, can citizens of Aridzona sign the Danish petition, too?