Category: Bad News

Horrible, unpleasant stuff

Enough Already

Bad News, Business

Oh, happy happy joy joy.

JPMorgan Weighs Shifting Thousands of Jobs Out of New York Area

If the transplantees don’t want to leave their extended families in Noo Yawk, you folks at JPMorgan can just move them a little further down the BoWash corridor — like, say, to Baltimore.  Should feel quite at home there, what with a Democrat government and all, and it’s only a short train ride back up the coast.

I think I can safely speak for all of us Texans down here in the DFW Metroplex:  we’re full of New Yorkers.

Instead of infesting filling the rest of America with your liberal asshole cosmopolitan employees, why not open up a new office in Los Angeles?  Gawd knows, they need an infusion of business in the Golden Shower State, and the transplanted Noo Yawkers will be quite at home with things like sky-high taxes, sky-high real estate prices, onerous licensing fees and feral anti-gun laws.  And the climate is better in SoCal than it is here.  Also, in Texas we have scorpions, snakes, poisonous spiders, scary-looking pickup trucks and sometimes, all of them combined:

  

Let’s not even talk about assault rifles, which can be bought just like candy, by grade-school kids at any corner-store 7-11:

The pastrami is lousy, and the bagels are made by Sarah Lee.  There was a vegan store around here someplace (Austin, maybe?) but it closed because they wouldn’t serve chicken-fried okra.  And people here think that “lox” is what y’all put on a truck’s toolbox.

And speaking of that kinda thing:  Ted Nugent has a ranch just south of here.


(As an aside, we Texans actually think ol’ Ted’s kinda soft when it comes to guns — I mean, he’s even on the board of the NRA, that bunch of compromising pussies.)

One last thought:  if you do send people down here, they’re gonna see an awful lot of these:

…all filled like this:

And when your folks converse with the locals, Question #3 will invariably be:  “And where do y’all go to church?”

Better have an answer.

Just sayin’.

Not Found Here

Bad News, Technology

In another bulletin from the so-called “Internet of Things” comes this shocker:

Amazon and Google unwittingly approved smart-speaker apps designed to eavesdrop on users and steal their passwords

“Unwittingly.”  Uh huh.

I’m rapidly getting to the stage where the prefix “smart-” is becoming equivalent to “socialist” or “Democrat”.

And the day I say something to an appliance (e.g. a Bad Word) and it talks back to me is the day it gets fed some .357 Magnum FMJ bullets till it shuts up.

(I’m not saying that’s also true of socialists or Democrats;  but the way they’re going, anything’s possible.)

Their Loss

Bad News, LGBTOSTFU

Looks like the LGBTOSTFU crowd has managed to get Chick-fil-A to close its first and only restaurant in Britishland.

As I pointed out to Mr. Free Market, The Englishman and Mrs. Sor in my email to them (entitled Homos 1, Good Guys 0), all this means is that the Brits (and especially the Sorensons, who live in Reading) will be denied probably the world’s best fried chicken.  Because, according to the freaks & loonies, the chain does eeevil and nasty stuff:

Reading Pride charged that the fast food chain’s charitable foundation “still supports questionable charities.” In particular, the LGBT activist group faulted the WinShape Foundation for donating $1.6 million to the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and $150,000 to the Salvation Army in 2017.
Reading Pride quoted the Fellowship of Christian Athletes’ statement of faith: “We believe God’s design for sexual intimacy is to be expressed only within the context of marriage. God instituted marriage between one man and one woman as the foundation of the family and the basic structure of human society. For this reason, we believe that marriage is exclusively the union of one man and one woman.”

As everyone knows, I am no Christian.  Nevertheless, I think I’ll go and get some nuggets — probably a double order, to make up for their losses in the UK — at the Chick-fil-A up the road, just in sympathy.

And then I’ll be off to the range.  Do thou the same, O My Readers.

Quote Of The Day

Bad News, Nature, QOTD

Heard on a radio show the morning after a tornado hit north Dallas and took out houses in Preston Hollow, a ritzy neighborhood:

“That area’s so exclusive, even the Fire Department’s phone number is unlisted.”

This happened about ten miles south of us, which sounds close but isn’t.  (Plano seldom gets hit by violent storms, possibly because the insurance payouts would put the companies out of business.  Worst that ever happened to our old Plano house was a tree getting decapitated in the front yard, and on another occasion, high winds driving the rain sideways  into the roof, lifting shingles and causing a leak indoors.)

Night before last, the only thing that happened to us was a momentary power failure — enough to make my garage door opener lock up, and the electric security gate ditto.  Enter manual labor (not mine, the Mexican maintenance team’s).

Oh, yeah:  President Trump was in Dallas for a campaign stop a couple days ago, but the two events are probably coincidental, no matter what the Jackals Of The Press may say.

End Times, California Style

Bad News, Funny Stuff, Gummint

It’s not often that I burst out with incredulous laughter when reading stuff on Teh Intarwebz, but this succeeded in making me do so:

There doesn’t seem to be any easy solution to the yearly wildfire season, and California policy has always seemed to work in opposition to fire safety. Environmentalists have, for decades, fought the clearing of underbrush that serves as fuel for these raging fires. Instead of doing basic maintenance, almost one million people will have to live without power. No one is ready for it.
The San Francisco Chronicle is reporting that people are stocking up on liquor and few of them have safety readiness kits. One resident they spoke to said she “knew she was woefully unprepared for days without power. Despite living along an earthquake fault and within a half block of where the 1991 Oakland conflagration destroyed the whole neighborhood, Weld didn’t have a comprehensive emergency kit ready to go.”

Then Megan Fox unloads on these idiots, wrathfully.  And I bet that 90% of them voted Democrat in past elections.

And Californians make fun of Southerners… while the ghost of Charles Darwin sniggers.

Fuck ’em.  I hope these Commie-enablers all go up in flames.

BTDT

Bad News

So there’s this list which ranks the most miserable cities in the U.S.  I’ve checked off those in the top 10 which I’ve actually seen / driven through / stayed in (don’t ask):

No question but that Gary deserves its spot.  Under “Non-Third World Shitholes” in the dictionary will be its picture:

Detroit we all know about, ditto Newark, Flint and Camden, which all resemble the above pic in one way or another.  Huntington Park should be driven around  let alone through, and I don’t know anything about Warren (although its location near Akron and Youngstown probably gives us a clue).  Pine Bluff is actually little different from most Southern rural shitholes, except that its inhabitants seem to be more violent than most, for reasons which escape me.

I’m a little puzzled by Passaic’s position, though.  I lived just a couple miles away from it, in Lincoln Park, and other than the fact that it gets flooded out every other year or so by its namesake river — perhaps the reason for its high misery ranking, come to think of it — it’s little different from most of its Noo Joizee neighbors e.g. Paterson (a true shithole) and Verona (only a little less shitty), neither of which made the top 10.

Feel free to add your miserable candidates in Comments.