Category: Bad News

Brought to you by:

And piss-poor the news is, too:

...aren’t you the guys who started the 2008 global economic crash?

...and we’ll tell you to stick it up your ass.

...can you say “errant torpedo”, children?

...and take a rough guess as to which party and what kind of people would oppose this.

...vs. tens of thousands of law-abiding gun owners in the same city who would disagree.  And on that note:

...and that’s “official” sales. Yup;  the more they hate us and our guns, the more we buy.

...too bad he didn’t start with himself.  Metaverse is going to pull the whole company down.

...thus making instant criminals of a couple hundred thousand people when they tell him to fuck off. 

...a little too late to help John McEnroe, but oh well.

...I was wondering when the feministicals would get round to ol’ Warren.

…unless you’re talking to socialists, in which case you need a spiked ClueBat.

And from linkless INSIGNIFICA:

        

Finally, here’s an Alt-PAIGE 3:

...have to say she’s not bad (in that “rough chick” kinda way), but she’s not a patch on the Real Paige.

YMMV.

No post-election items, just the usual rubbish sponsored by:

The Breakfast Of Champions

And for the rest…

...little fucker should have been scourged, then impaled — but that’s just me.

….muy doloroso.  Also, huevos y putas.

….lemme tell ya, that placenta stuff is a cast-iron bitch to get off upholstery.

….missed it by thismuch.  Also keyword:  Africa.

….fuck this gun-banning asshole San Francisco company and all who work for it.

...hey, if it gets rid of the “der-das-die-den” bullshit, I’m cool.

...this has not been my experience;  although twenty does seem to be overreaching a little.

…

...burn them with fire.

...based on what I know of boys, that sounds about right.

...don’t forget your magic crystal and pyramid either, you fucking gullible morons.

...trust me, you do not want to see this… oh, you do? Here ya go, then, and on your own head be it.

And in INSIGNIFICA:

   

And in our Paige Three segment:

...valid question, that.  Let’s look at a few action shots:

Aaaand that’s enough swinging.

Sponsored by:

…which is what you’ll do when you see the news.  To whit:

...sheesh, when even Brit journalists can see it...

...classified by medical science as “Ultra-Mega-Deluxe-Horny Syndrome”, a medical condition unique in that it carries the death penalty.  Or should.

...myself, I’d advocate lashings with sjamboks, but who am I to argue with the Greatest Living Englishman?

...I don’t think that’s possible, Glenn.

And from the Dept. of !!Scientific Studies!! comes:

...never knew I was a gamer, but there ya go.  That said, the study was probably conducted in the library at Broadmoor.

...are you fucking joking?

...key words: “in Turkey”.

And some good news, for a change:

...shouldn’t have served a day, let alone six months.

On Paige 3:

...oh no, that just ain’t so!!

And in the “Oh, To Be In England“ Dept.:

...all other serious crimes having been solved, that is.

And:

...how would anyone even know? 

...leading one to ask:  is there any car-based activity in Britishland today that doesn’t carry a penalty?

Then:

...actually, that’s quite a common affliction for people living south of the River Tweed.

And from The Place With No Links, a.k.a. INSIGNIFICA:

 

   

Finally, some real news:

...I would imagine that being locked up in a house with La Charlotte would strengthen quite a few things, e.g. the will to live.

 

And speaking of being at home:  shouldn’t you be on your way to work?

Brought to you by:

Wait… that may be our Valentine’s Day sponsor… oh well.

...just throwing this out there, but:  maybe it wasn’t an accident?

...I bet there are a whole bunch of American women who’d like to do the same Over Here — and as a bonus, the Ukes would have a far more “diverse” army, if you get my drift.  And in the same vein:

...I misread the third word up there, and thought they were being sarcastic.

And speaking of Catholics:

...no comment.

...his name no doubt having been taken from the Chicago voter rolls.

And in our new weekly feature, PAIGE 3:

...girl sure “wows” me (if that’s the word I’m thinking about).

...can’t say I blame him.  Would live there in a heartbeat, myself.

 
...that’s because we pass on some of our brain power to our sons, so they can continue to win more Nobel Prizes for mathematics and science than their sisters.

...hippie invasion to begin in 5…6…3…7…2… dude, whatever.

...and considering who said that, you need to lock up your sons… and grandsons, just to be on the safe side.

 
...like visiting a lion safari park on foot, and complaining when you get clawed and bitten.

And in link-less INSIGNIFICA:

 

…...tried all eight, back in in my youth. False advertising, nothing earth-shattering.

And now our Health Feature, with some yoga:

Quit yer gawking, and get to work.