Category: Bad News

So let’s skirt the boundaries of good taste one more time, by looking at the news of yore.

…

In Britishland News:

...mostly at gas stations and cafe-type stores, so no need to panic.

…

...and you can fuck right off too, you unctuous, slimy piece of shit.

And it’s time to hear the call of EVERYBODY PANIC !!!! again:

...yeah, whatever.  Go and peddle your little scare stories somewhere else.  And:

...and are these experts telling us why and in which population the virus is spreading so fast?
#HomoSex

And speaking of monkeys, here’s the latest from The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:

...borrowing tactics from TxGov Abbot and FlGov DeSantis, eh?  Yer welcome.

...well, somebody might as well use them.

In Election News:

...see, under the reign of World-Emperor Kim:

...nobody cares what you think, either.  Even if you did win the competition for “Most Likely To Have New Career on OnlyFans”.  And speaking of the inconsequential:

…

...any guesses which county in Texas?
#TravisAustinCommieAssholes #NoSurprisesThere

In Motoring Technology News:

...I’m so old, I can remember when the only “software” in trucks was between the drivers’ ears.
...yeah [sigh], I miss ’em too.

And in gloriously link-free 

…considering he’s already had two goes at cultivating your little garden of delight, I seriously doubt he’s missing anything.

...pay no attention to the envious assholes, Demi me old darling;  you look sensational and it’s been money well spent.

And that’s the back side of the news.

So chug down that morning tipple, and let’s get on with it.

In The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:

...y’all want us just to kill him here, or do you want him back so you can have the pleasure?  (offer not valid in states without the death penalty)

...it’s actually all a tragic mistake caused by a language problem.  When he was told “Go get some from Five Guys”…

Then on to International News:

...wake up, old son:  Biden has never been your ally, unlike Trump.  And speaking of whom:

...I’m not so sure that the Stupid Party needs advice from this guy:

...but let’s keep “Trump” and “blowout” handy for later.

Some news from the Daily Woker:

...now if only they could concentrate on making decent beer...

Some Crime News:

...who do they think they are:  the Secret Service?

...ya think?  The real question is:  why?

In the Business World:

...what;  did all those government subsidies run out?

In Travel News:

...well, perhaps if you allowed them to drink booze;  but noooo, it offends your fucking stupid  guidebook or whatever.

In Parish News:

...yeah, bet he was surprised at being arrested for impersonating an influential Epstein client.

From the Medical Files:

…

And in the perpetually link-free 

 

And as we look at properties in :

...I bet she does.  She always has that “JBF” look about her...

...or that “just about to be” look:

 

And that’s the end of the nipples  news.

Speaking of fun stuff:

…

And speaking of sick, here’s Crime News:

...”could be executed”?  Volunteers to throw the switch, the line forms behind me.  And quit that pushing and shoving.

And Crime News (Krautland Department):

...of course, if Germany were to reinstate the death penalty for such crimes, that would solve the problem one way or the other, yes?

...yeah, that’ll work.  They’ll just come back as Ukrainian refugees, or something.  And then the Krauts wonder why this is happening:

...”hard right”?  LOL I know some ol’ boys in Arizona and Louisiana — to mention just two — who’d make these AfD guys look like little girls.   But anyway… it looks like that has happened.

In other Furrin News:

...and after the drone strikes are completed and the dust has settled, we need to ask what the hell  US servicemen are doing in Turkey in the first place.

...”Husband Of The Year” candidate.  Keyword:  France.

...I thought this only happened in shitholes like Russia or California.

In further Election News:

...I think that mentioning George Washington and Joe Biden in the same sentence should be a misdemeanor, unless we’re making a “Best” and “Absolute Worst” comparison.

In Sporting News:

...number of people who actually care about this:  0

And it’s time for link-free 

 

…

And while sauntering down

...Nicole honey, methinks that ship sailed a long time ago.  I mean, wasn’t this also you?

Just wait till your kids are old enough to watch your movies… now that’s going to be embarrassing.

And so we come to the end of the Redhead Roundup.

So let’s look at some (mostly) non-fake news.

...just exposing another one of her many lies — the bitch has always been of the “no borders” persuasion.  Also see:

...just doing her best to keep up with her VP’s record of lies about his background.
#LikeJohnFuckfaceKerry

In Business News:

...this would have sounded so much better if IBM were moving all their R&D back to the United States, but IBM ceased to be an actual American company way back in the 1990s.

And would it be a week without some We’re All Gonna DIIIEEEE! news?

...quick, impose a lockdown!
#NazzoFastGuido

Some Sports News:

…that’s because he may be a professional racer, but he’s clearly an amateur drinker.

In Military News:

...nothing about the Army has looked good since Desert Storm ended and DEI/LGBTOSHTFU was installed.
#HangMarkMilley

This just in from The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:

...it’s “California-In-The-Rockies”;  what else did you expect?

...wait:  the FBI did some actual law enforcement?
#SarahsShockedFace

And in the continuous fake news a.k.a. Global Cooling Climate Warming Change©:

…

In the Commercial News Dept.:

...sorry, sweetie;  I know you’re just doing it for the $$$, but no way no how no chance not ever will I buy anything from that bunch of San Francisco anti-gun Commie assholes.

And speaking of giant dicks, we have in Medical News:

...one of the perils of your wife being gluten-intolerant?  Keyword:  Lebanon.

And after that snippet, the usual collection of 

  ...lemme guess: “Forgive and forget”?

...people who have no lives of their own.

...nope, I have no idea who she is either, but that’s never stopped me before:

And that’s the rear end of the news.