Category: Bad News

The news, like Biden’s addled brain, is all over the place today.

…oh really?  Just wait till you try to pawn your vibrator when cash is tight, sweetie.

…I probably speak for quite a few people when I say, “No more.  Ever.”

And speaking of people we don’t want to see or hear from ever again:

…ah yes, hurricanes:  that deadly disease.

…yawn.

…and the word is “slew”, not the name of a noizee 70s Brit rock band.

This is the shocking moment an Orthodox Jewish man
is punched in the face by a passer-by in a ‘racist attack’
that left him unconscious – just hours after a child was
attacked nearby.
…let’s all play “guess the passer-by’s race”, shall we?

…and only the U.S. State Department was surprised by this news item.

…we’re just trying to keep them feeling at home, right?

And speaking of disgusting:

…not that I would want to be in the same zip code as any of them anyway.

…everyone knows you never go Full Jesus.

…and she looks about how you’d expect her to look.

Total Suckage Department:

     

…why did this headline make me giggle like a schoolgirl?

And now, INSIGNIFICA:

 

And yet another sign that the Apocalypse is nigh:

…non-alcoholic Guinness.  Jaysus wept.

Here’s Logan’s Run  star Jenny Agutter:

All the news that isn’t about Afghanistan.

…well, women shouldn’t play rugby in the first place, so…

…fake news, because you’re not allowed to carry a gun in NYFC.  Ditto below:

 
…never happened.

And similarly:

…doubleplusunpossible, because laws.

And:

…because legal gun owners are the cause of all Britain’s crime problems, you see.

…I see a job at the Clinton Foundation in his future.

…eaten by a bear, was it?  No?  Then it’s “grisly”.  You fucking illiterate assholes.

…you mean your parents signed your life away — or maybe they were already at the bank, depositing your money into their accounts.  Hell, they weren’t even around when Justin Bieber popped your teenage cherry.

…lol

And on that note, it’s time for SEX NEWS:

…key word:  Michigan.

…is it so wrong to get a woody when reading this headline?

…what’s really funny are the comments in the article.

And just a little INSIGNIFICA:

   

No doubt getting a last-ditch effort for money before the old wailer pops his clogs.

Finally:

Okay, that’s enough Tess.

News even sillier than normal — whatever “normal” means.

…like nobody saw this coming.

…and that’s  because there is no specific plot.  Actually, the violence will come from either the Biden Administration or its paramilitary groups, like Antifa or the FBI.  There’s far more evidence of that.

…they should send it all to Africa, where it will rot in warehouses without ever reaching the people who need it most — like most aid sent there.

….and only our State Department couldn’t see this coming:

…proving once and for all that we should have just nuked the place instead of invading it.

On a related note from another Muslim shithole:

…ah yes, that “Muslim enlightenment” shows its face.  Likewise:

,,,

And now, a Corona break:

 
…and:

…meanwhile:

…the next funeral for Irony will be held at a time TBA.

…although I always thought Robin was just Batman’s rent-boy, so this might actually be an improvement.

…my question is:  when the hell did 11-year-olds start having proms?

From the “You’d need a heart of stone not to laugh” department:

…I guess temper tantrums  sometimes have consequences.  Key word: Russia.

Now comes the time for sex:

…yup;  once he got his cherry popped, the government lost all interest.

…Dr. Kim sez:  sometimes a threesome can be beneficial.

…surprisingly good advice.  Cue feministical outrage in 3…2…1…

…for those who missed it, her “abs” are that little bit under the overhang.

And on the same topic, more or less:

Ellen Davies, now 21, from London, decided to change her lifestyle aged 16 when she was forced to travel two hours to find a prom dress that would fit her

…but trust me:  you really don’t want to see the “Before” pics.

Here’s a better example:

After yesterday’s rather bleak Roundup, today’s is 100% INSIGNIFICA.

…FFS, weren’t the endless fairy movies enough for the Tolkien groupies?

…key word:  Brazil, where the legal age of consent is 14.

…given the circumstances, I’m surprised it isn’t more common.

…left a note?  After eight days of fucking bagpipes, I’d be getting stabby and shooty.

…my question:  did the kids have to be informed of the vile parents’ porno trip?

…oh FFS, lock up your sons.  No man should.

…or, the caffeine/sugar equivalent of two Classic Cokes.  No big deal.

And some gratuitous pics of Duncan’s house Nigora:

 
…yeah, I know.  But she’s a Slav, so it’s not rayciss.

Oh, and one last piece of good news:

…that karma thing…