Category: Bad News

Aaaahhhh… Australians, keeping it classy as always.

In Everybody Panic! News:

...♫ ♪ ♫ won’t be fooled again ♪ ♫  [/Peter Townsend]

...published 96 hours ago.  I report, you decide.

...the line of volunteers starts behind me, and quit that shoving, y’all.

Speaking of vermin:

...fuck me, y’all can’t even stop killing each other on your very own holiday.

In The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:

...our Nigel may want to look to the rather elegant “Greek Solution”:

...too bad this approach wouldn’t work in the Rio Grande.

...the Strylians were never going to go for the”Greek Solution” — unless of course the Chinese migrants were unvaccinated.

...send him to Greece.  By boat.

...dunno about you, but I’m not shocked at all.  In some Kraut cities, it’s 100%.

In Political News:

...if by “many”, you mean “all”, Tommy:  then yes, yes there is.

...you had me at “Anna Paulina Luna”:

And in the Corporate Bonehead Department:

...which means no more of this:

...or this:

...or even this:

...you stupid, stupid cunts.

And speaking of…

...of course she did.  Just imagine if it were a man who’d done it:  oh, the lamentations.

...of course it was.  I wonder who pays this “expert’s” salary?

And in still more meaningless 

  

...welcome to a man’s world, sweetheart.

And as we saunter down :

...one of the better examples thereof, I think:

And speaking of lying, that’s the end of the news.

So, in that spirit:

...keyword:  Russia.  Turn them Russki chicks down at your peril.

...”Calling all Kardashians!”

In other news:

...that’ll teach him to start talking sense instead of Party dogma.

...following rumors that he’d got his hands on the Epstein Client List.

...which won’t happen, of course.  Not that the silly bitch doesn’t deserve some kind of censure, that is.

And in The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:

...hold on, I’m looking around for Sarah Hoyt’s shocked face.

How about some Freak News:

...in what way, “harmful” — I mean, what kind of snowflakes are trying to pass themselves off as Olympic athletes here?

...to the surprise of absolutely nobody.  Eat some steak, you fucking freaks.

...wait, you mean lesbians want actual women, and not dickless men?  Guess they’re not interested in that inverted Crying Game thing. 

And speaking of cows:

...charge:  “Causing premature death to veal producer.”

In Medical News:

…and:

…

And now for some 

 

... how dare you set such archaic rules for your barely-of-age daughter?

...newsflash:  healthy, athletic and wealthy young men pull beautiful chicks.

And that’s all the news fit to play with.

You’re going to need a drink after seeing this lot.

...nah, not that one;  that’s some other Simon Cowell.  Made you look.

...ah now, that’s Our Simon:  ready to do anything for TV ratings, the foul bastard.

In Glueball Jewhate News:

…

Relax, Jacques;  it’s Paris.

Also, news from The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©, U.S. Division:

...causing poor children to starve:  it’s the United  African Way.

And speaking of the poverty-stricken:

...of course, they’re only poor African members, so donations won’t be affected.

And in Political Disaster! News:

...not that the Commie bitch doesn’t deserve it, of course.

...you mean like Biden with the student debt forgiveness thing?

Meanwhile, in reality:

And let’s hope he learns from this guy:

…

It’s not just in the Americas:

...and:

...of course, in Euro terms, “far-right” is “JFK Democrat” on the U.S. political spectrum.

In Health News:

...so no different from what happens in a pub, then.

From the Travel News desk:

...key word:  Mumbai.

Some Parenting News:

...explanation:  loony father and mother, likely insane kids.

And in yet more 

 

...fuck Hamilton, he’s going to Ferrari next year anyway.

And driving down :

And as Clint Eastwood might say:  “That’s enough of that.”