News Roundup

Short and sweet, like Ariel Winter.


…which rather makes nonsense of the poll results below:


to which I ask:  WHICH Americans?  Did they poll only the Harvard faculty lounge?


given how much the Chinese hate Blacks, that’s probably a design feature of the Chinkvirus, not a flaw.


guess their jobs weren’t as “essential” as they thought.  Let’s hope it’s a trend.


..whereby you don’t have to stay at home to have sex with yer girlfriend.


and yet, we’re the bad guys for doing stuff like this:


damn, but this is taking a long time.


and even though this particular incident was in Britishland, it’s a left-wing ploy everywhere.  Which is why we’re not surprised by:


because it’s easier to hijack a mass mailing and forge different votes than to do all that tedious cemetery work to find new voters.


this guy is a bigger ginger pussy than his aunt Sarah Ferguson ever was.

News Roundup

…with even shorter commentary than usual!


but what would really upset them would be the number of volunteers to man the firing squads.  And considering they’re all on the ChiCom payroll.


of course we do.  So we can get lots more of this kind of thing: 

and a special message to the has-beens known as the Bush Dynasty:  shut the fuck up.


and you’ve gotta see the pic.


because Communism is SO civilized… you murderous cocksuckers.  And:


at a rough guess, pretty much everything they said, including “and” and “the”.


and for the first time ever, I’m envious of the Danes.


I always knew he didn’t kill himself.  From the funniest website since the Babylon Bee.


LOLCue Big Education’s screams of outrage as their lies are exposed, in 3… 2… 1


and when he recited his wedding vows,  still no one could understand what he was saying.


hey, no fair, wait a minute:  did Republicans have a plan B when John McCain became their frontrunner?


okay, stop laughing now, this is serious.

News Roundup

Just popping over for a little of the old in-out, darling. [/Clockwork Orange]



which will make it a little difficult to manage the Commie louts in my preferred manner, but oh well.


I was going to rant about filthy foreigners and their horrible dietary choices, but then I remembered things like refried beans, squid ink, black pudding and White Castle sliders.


yup, keep in prodding the rattlesnake, Governor Witless.  And the media reaction:


actually, the stormtroopers would be the state police agents that the governor is using to enforce her insane lockdown policy.


so not much has changed, then.


actually, we already hate you, you Communist motherfuckers.  Trump’s just reminding us why.


and Harvard professor Bartholet uses incident as further reason for banning homeschooling.


as the BritPolice’s fearless war on victimless crime continues.


I guess it all depends on how you define “spiritual wellbeing”.

Which reminds me:  I need to stop off at Goody Goody later today for a case of Sipsmiths.

News Roundup

In and out in ninety seconds, just like a teenage boy’s first sexual encounter.


a rough guess as to why would be that the banks will have zero chance of getting any money back from the airlines, and it’s easier to stiff millions of individuals than try to sue a few airlines.


which would piss me off, if I ever used the bloated and stupid MS Word for anything.


wait:  China’s been lying?  Excuse me while I go and borrow Sarah Hoyt’s shocked face.


except that the MexGov, unlike China, wasn’t lying;  they’re just stupidly inefficient.


serve her right, the little cock-teaser.


and in other news, the Japs Asians just bombed Pearl Harbor.


see “Pearl Harbor”, above.  Gotta hand it to the DHS:  always a day late and a billion dollars short.  Also, I’m hanging onto Sarah’s shocked face for a while, because


you mean Politico isn’t a dependable source for news, and is just like all the other China-asskissing media?


oops.


ooohh, he is going to be in SO much trouble for flouting the “social distancing” regulations so egregiously.

News Roundup

Short takes and outtakes:

     and       
…[sigh] they grow up so quickly, these days.


OMG HOARDERS!!!


…next, they’ll be saying the same thing about a situation going “tits up” and a mistake being called a “cock-up”.


tyrannical judge says do this, cops say fuck you.  In Houston.


…it’s still the most dangerous place on Earth, only now it’s because of Muslims and not airborne cobras.


and yet, he wasn’t executed on the spot.  Because California.


I think that should read “COSMETICS” watchdog.

Coronavirus: Calls for price controls dismissed as ‘economically illiterate’
which of course they are.  Read the article to remind yourselves, if you’ve forgotten the arguments.


and absolutely NO PRIZES will be awarded for correctly guessing the ethnicity or national origins of the rioters.

News Roundup

News commentary, as written by Hemingway.  Links in the pics.

From Britishland:


…yeah, welcome to OUR Deep State world, Bubba.


as all Amazon and Wal-Mart customers know, Chinese quality control is legendary.  And speaking of which:


ordinarily I’d be worried, except that none of them will work.  Also, we need things to shoot at while we’re cooped up in our houses(Pro tip: 00 buckshot)


(unspoken:) Give Us More Money.  However, if you look at the map, the famine would likely have struck even without the Chinkvirus.  In other words:  carry on, nothing to see here.


…they’re all gonna die.  When Gummint is optimistic, it’s time to head for the bunkers.


52-year-old single mother of four (all by different fathers) needs sex.  Quite a prospect.


all well and good, except it’s almost impossible to monitor abusive behavior during a lockdown.  But hey, let’s throw money at it:  that always works.  Stupid Seffrican tart.


looks like I may have to be cooped up for a while yet.  Shit.

And finally:


I report, you decide: