Category: Bad News

Commentary short and sweet, like Isla Fisher.

…from his office in San Antonio.

…no doubt upon the advice of his shaman after reading the chicken entrails.  And speaking of fairy tales:

…is our preview of the feature film, “Green New Deal”.  And:

…as Britain and California get in their race for the bottom.  Speaking of racing to the bottom:

…I know, they backed away from the policy after a massive public outcry.  But the very fact that they thought of doing this… Also, speaking of dying cities:

…as Chicago, New York, Portland, Seattle and the rest of the socialist paradises start to circle the bowl.

…BritGov to ban pens in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… I mean, nobody needs more than a crayon, amirite?

…I’m thinking daisycutter bombs and MOABs, not “bigger guns”;  but that’s just me.

…welcome to the U.S., Yer Gingerness.  Now bend over that IRS desk, just like the rest of us.

…seeing as the BritGov has solved all Britain’s other pressing social needs, that is.

And finally, some excellent news for a change:

…there was some other crap in the headline about face masks, but this is all I care about.

With commentary so brief, I’m being sued by Fruit Of The Loom.

…we all know that Arabs are thieves, but when they appropriate our Injun  Native American technology, that’s just beyond the pale.  Who do they think they are:  Chinese?

  and:      
…hate to break it to you, Mayor Lightweight, but Chicago is already the poster child for gun control.  Clearly, it’s working really well for you.

…which is not even the most stupid thing she’s ever said — she defies satire.

…yup, that’s going to appeal to their core fan base — assuming they still have one.

…until next week.  Still, this seems to make sense (unlike most of the other shit).

…I just wish this wasn’t satire.

…why limit it to roadblocks?  Hit the gas pedal every time you see a group of black-clad assholes, to save the republic.  Use those man-killer pickup trucks, damn it.

Now some really BIG IMPORTANT news:

…to be honest, that’s pretty much all she has.

And finally, for some light relief:

…if this happened in the U.S., the deceased asshole’s family would no doubt be suing Stihl  for improper safety controls.

All the news that’s fit to ridicule, like this idiot.  (Hint:  it’s not the fake tits you should be regretting as much as those foul tattoos.)

…because the New York Times, CNN/ABC/CBS/CNBC, the Washington Post and the L.A. Times are always prepared to showcase both liberal and conservative viewpoints.

…LOL Biden could pick Giggles The Girl-Clown as his VP, and he’d still lose in a landslide.

…because lions don’t care about things like “exclusivity” when it comes to menu choices.  Africa Wins Again.

…so refuse to pay the fine, get sent to jail and then sue to get released immediately because of the Chinkvirus risk.  Piece of cake.

…I’m going to go out on a limb here and predict that this is not going to work.

…because the Massachusetts courts have obviously nothing better to do than bother with shit like this.

…my bad for thinking “Beverly Hills” meant that all the participants were White.  Pay no attention;  that’s just my White privilege speaking.

…no, it isn’t.  The only “catastrophe” is that parents are realizing how little their kids need government-managed schools in order to be educated.

…wait, we’re not going to see the customary four presidential debates?  I feel cheated.

And finally:

…good question, although I think the voters of Colorado, Michigan, Oregon, New York and Washington (to name but some) may have a few quibbles about that.

Also in the news:

Lady Gaga looks like a dog (okay, maybe that’s not really news, but whatever).

Before you read Teh Headlines below, here’s a little pick-me-up.

…looks like that “assimilation” thing is working well for the Krauts.

…somebody explain to me why punishment for a crime like this shouldn’t include flaying before execution.

…this is me, wearing Sarah Hoyt’s shocked face.

…man, I didn’t know that Trump has 60 million campaign workers.

…and I’ll believe that poll, as long as “Do you think Blacks are racist?” was one of the questions.

…joins Mandela, far too late, in that great Murdering Bastards Club In The Sky.

…who?  Oh yeah, the guy who’s going to lose an election by a larger margin than George McGovern.

…let’s start more modestly by canceling stupid.

…wrong as always, Rather, you lying Commie cocksucker.

…the only thing newsworthy about this one is that it wasn’t Nicholas Cage.

…I know, I know:  this item no good without pitchurs:

Not quite zero, but close.