Ensnared

As someone who’s been involved in marketing and advertising for pretty much most of his adult life, I am generally immune to clever-pants packaging and advertising.

But I saw this set of erasers at the Sooper-Seekrit Mailbox Place the other day, and just had to buy them even though I have no need of any such thing anymore:

I actually chuckled when reading them — and if I knew Britney Spears’s home address, I’d send her the “oops” one.

Making you buy something you don’t really need just because the message is irresistible:   fundamentally, the sign of excellent marketing.

Clueless

Also in my Inbox, this time from American Airlines:

Bearing in mind that I live in north Texas and have pretty much all the heat I can handle (and more), which garden spots can AA be pimping?

#1:

It’s also known for its crime and tourist ripoffs.  Also, isn’t hurricane season just around the corner?  Pass.  Next:

#2:


Ah yes… NYfC in the summer heat.  Always a pleasure, in a place whose crime and ripoffs make T&C look like a bunch of complete amateurs — and that was before all the recent silliness.  As they say there, fuggeddabahdit.  Next:

#3:

In Texas terms, going to Florida in summer is described as “out of the frying pan and onto the gas ring.”  Thanks, but if I want heat and humidity, I can just step out onto my patio.  And finally:

#4:

Yeah, thanks.  If I want Mex street food, we’ve got a couple taco trucks that can be found the apartment parking lot every Friday and Saturday.  And… Aztec ruins, in Mexico City?  I thought the conquistadores  kinda leveled them.  But I could be wrong, as I may be wrong about Mex City’s crime rate.

Great promotion, American.  You utter dicks.

From My Inbox

…news from Amazon:

Well now:  considering that the CEO of GrubHub has publicly stated that Trump supporters/MAGA types need not bother applying for positions at his company, I think it’s only fair that this Trump supporter/MAGA type refuses to do business with his poxy company, ever.  Even if it’s free.

Pointless Shit

I’m always ranting about how the auto industry has overloaded basic transportation with evermore-complex technology (3 seat-position memory options? FFS), but of course, they’re not the only ones.

Here’s another example, seen via a link on Insty’s page:

What a load of bullshit.  My old Keurig essentially has two options:  size of cup, regular/strong brew, and that’s it.  (“High Altitude Setting”? FFS #2)

Oh wait… I forgot mine’s warning light for “There’s No More Water In The Reservoir, You Idiot, Can’t You See Through The Clear Plastic?”

Let’s not forget the lie of “Brushed Silver” when it’s just shiny plastic.

And forgive me, but the whole point of a Keurig is that you can make a cuppa quickly without waiting for the water to boil, so the “Auto On/Off” switch is the work of Satan.  (Yeah, “saves electricity” blah blah blah… fuck the whales.)

Needless to say, in the spirit of manufacturers everywhere, my model Keurig is no longer available;  so when it finally quits working, I’ll be forced to buy one of these multi-featured over-complex monstrosities at, of course, a price which is 40% more than I paid for mine.

Don’t even talk to me about the cost of replacing my ageing VW, or my soaring blood pressure will ensure that the Tiguan outlives its owner.

Well, So Much For That Tagline

We’re all accustomed to the advertising tagline from the Kraut carmakers which touts “German engineering” as the selling proposition for buying one of their overpriced cars.

That doesn’t seem to be the case, as evidenced by this J.D. Power survey of not so long ago:

It’s a large sample (80,000), by the way (the full methodology can be found here).

Basically, apart from all the Kraut shenanigans involved with cartels and illegal manipulations (diesel emissions coff coff etc.), it all boils down to the Germans making their cars evermore sophisticated but in doing so, more fragile and prone to breakage.

Where have we heard this before? Oh yeah, pretty much everywhere.

And people snigger when I say how much I’d prefer to drive something like a Merc 280 SL than any of their newer models…