Category: Drive Time

Insane Build

Drive Time

Okay, so you have an old Alfa Romeo 105 GTV rust-bucket body (is there any other kind?), and you decide to rebuild it, only instead of the original four-cylinder two-liter engine, you say, “What the hell, I’ll just drop a Ferrari 360 V8 into it and see how things shake out.”

Here’s the result.  Take the 15 minutes out of your day, and feel better about the human race, that it can still throw out men like this.

And he’s Strylian, which makes it all the more memorable.  Best quote:  “I had to make everything!”

Including handmaking the leather seats.  (!!!!)

Alfarrari?  Why not?

Not Just No

Drive Time, Gummint, Watermelons

…but “fuck off and die” no.

I refer here, of course, to this push to make us all give up our regular gasoline-powered cars and replace them with fucking Duracell* vehicles.

Here’s one tale of woe.

And here’s the problematic infrastructure.

So fuck ’em.

Come to think of it, we could always switch to horses, except that those assholes at Peta will probably throw a hissy about that too.

I think I need to go to the range (he said, apropos of nothing).  Those guns aren’t going to shoot all by themselves, you know.

*And I mean no disrespect towards Duracell, who make excellent batteries.  I’m just not going to use them to power my car.

A Tale Of Two Ferraris

Drive Time

Okay, two tales, if we’re going to be pedantic. First, Harry takes us for a drive in a borrowed 288 GTO, and if you aren’t entranced (like he is) by that one, then by all means enjoy this little drive in a 365 P Berlinetta Speciale (as Former Drummer Knob puts it, a Dino with three seats and a 12-cylinder engine).

As I told him, after watching the second video:  “I’m not even a Ferrari fan, but that 365 is Left Nut Material.”

His response to why three seats:  “Room for you and two chicks.”

My response to that:  “It’s a Ferrari;  more like one chick and Antonio The Mechanic.”

Or Antonella La Meccanica…

Midnight conversations with old friends… what would we do without them?

Playing Field, Leveling Of

Drive Time, Sports

NASCAR fans or non-Formula 1 devotees can skip this post.

Consider the final standings for the 2023 F1 season:

 

If that looks like a runaway train for both Max Verstappen and Red Bull, then it was.  Verstappen won 19 out of the 21 races of the season, and Red Bull’s Perez won one.

Which has led to an interesting game among fans, thinking about leveling the field, so to speak, for the 2024 season.  Here are the favorites:

  • Level the driver playing field and find another Perez-level driver for Red Bull to replace Max.
  • Force Max to wear an eye patch and strap one arm to his leg.
  • Force Red Bull to use Trabant engines. (“Then they’d only come 3rd.”)
  • …and Reliant Robin 3-wheel technology.  (“Okay, 4th.”)
  • Fire Max and sign Daniel Ricciardo.  Or Logan Sargeant.
  • …and so on.

Let’s see;  only 90 days till the new season begins.

In the meantime, there are the college football championships and the Super Bowl… which I care about as much as most of you care about F1.

Italians: Never Trust ‘Em

Drive Time

I think it was Richard Hammond who, on the old Top Gear show, pointed out that Ferrari’s technical statistics were often flat-out lies:  “How many horsepower does our new model have?  A million!”

It’s not just their statistics, though.  Try this one on for size:

Legendary Italian car maker Ferrari has no intention of phasing out combustion engines and going fully electric or hybrid anytime soon, promising Sunday to keep making the eight and 12-cylinder engines it has made its trademark at least until the end of the 2030s. (May 2023)

And then there’s this one:

An iconic supercar brand is set to launch its first ever EV, with a new factory already in the works.  The luxury car giant is planning to open a new facility in Italy to produce its new all-electric models.

Who could this be, this “luxury car giant”?

Ferrari boss Benedetto Vigna confirmed that the company was on the right track in developing a new electric car.  (November 2023)

I know, I know:  this isn’t exactly a lie:  Ferrari never said that they’d make only internal combustion engine (ICE) cars… but they sure as hell skated around the issue.

Just as they do with their technical specs.

And of course, they’ll cheat when it comes to the sound their new Duracell cars will make.

Bastardi.