Category: Morons & Idiots

Same Again

Bad News, Freaks & Loonies, Morons & Idiots

I’ve spoken before of the spectacle that is London’s Notting Hill Carnival (read it first), and apparently this year it’s not too different:

Police have arrested at least 330 people in connection with incidents at the Notting Hill Carnival, the Met said tonight – with three people including a 32-year-old mother left fighting for their lives.

Five people were stabbed today, taking the total across the two days to eight [last year it was nine — K], while three people sustained slash wounds and one incident was said to have involved a corrosive substance.

Nothing says “I Haz My Culture” like tossing acid in someone’s face.  As for the rest, same ol’, same ol’.  As the rozzers say:

‘We are tired of saying the same words every year’.

Pass.

Oh Yeah, Baby

Freaks & Loonies, Hippie Filth, Marxists, Morons & Idiots, Muzzies

Reader Mike S. tells me he has taken out a bank loan to afford all the popcorn he’s going to need for this little shit-show:

Things are quickly heating up in Chicago. Nervous Democrats are wondering if the city might come under siege by swarms of pro-Palestinian protesters and/or if they will face riots by extremists – with the explicit goal of defeating Kamala Harris. Public estimates are that between 30,000 to 50,000 protesters are expected to enter the city.

A vast coalition comprising of more than 200 Palestinian, Marxist, anti-imperialist and progressive organizations have signed on to join the “March on the DNC 2024” which is planning marches and rallies between August 19 and 21.

Meanwhile, Chicago authorities have opened a defunct courthouse to streamline arrests and have cleared 30 additional courtrooms if there are mass arrests, according to NewsNation.

The city has postponed all criminal jury trials scheduled for next week and “criminal judges from other divisions of Cook County have been asked to clear their calendars in case they need to be called into action to help process those arrested,” according to the news channel.

Read the whole thing to get a full flavor of all the participants.

And I never ever thought I’d say this, but:

“Where’s Mayor Richard J. Daley when we really need him?”

Oh, and thanks, Mike;  I’ll have a bowl of that popcorn, with extra butter please.

Pure Comedy

Morons & Idiots, Politics

Fine, I know he’s the prime contender for the late Sheila Jackson Lee’s title of “Stupidest Person In Congress”, but even for him, this is rich:

Representative Adam Schiff (D-CA) said Wednesday on ABC’s “The View” that it was “hard to find someone better qualified in our history to become president” than Vice President Kamala Harris.

Ummm I can think of half a dozen, and that’s just since 1900.  (Okay, since you ask:  Taft, Coolidge, Hoover, Eisenhower, Nixon and Reagan.  Hell, Warren Harding was better-qualified than the DEI VP, never mind the lesser Republicans like the two Bushes.)

And if we go further back in our history… oh, Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Madison, Jackson, Lincoln… need I go further?

I would suggest that Schiff undergo a lobotomy, but I suspect he already has.

Stupid Is (Part Deux)

Africa, Morons & Idiots

Okay, there’s stupid (voting for a Democrat Socialist), very stupid (waterbombing Danny Trejo)… and then there’s ultra-stupid:

A Spanish tourist reportedly has been “trampled to death” by elephants in South Africa after he tried to get close to them to take pictures. 

If you look up the word “pendejo”  in the dictionary, that’ll be his pic you see, right above that of the Trejo Waterbomber.

I remember one time I was driving friends around the Kruger Park when we suddenly came upon a solitary elephant.  I stopped, of course, at a distance of about thirty yards.

“Get a little closer!” urged one friend (American, first time in Africa, in fact I think it was the first time she’d ever left New England).
Of course, I refused.
“He’s just standing there,” she said.
“See how his ears are flapping?”
“I know, it’s so cute!”
“He’s warning us off,” I said, and put the minibus into reverse.

Then the elephant took three giant steps towards us, whereupon I tried my very best to break the world speed record for reversing a VW minibus down a dirt road.  Even so, he got to within about ten yards of the bus before our acceleration took us clear.  Fortunately, the road was straight and after a minute or so the elephant stopped, flapped his ears at us one more time, and exited stage right.

I took the opportunity to turn the bus around, and got the hell out of the area.

One of the others managed to get a single pic of Dumbo, right before he got on the road and decided to shoo us off.


(in the very left-hand bottom of the pic you can see the car windowsill, to give an idea of how close he was, no zoom lens)

Get out of the car? Close to a herd with calves?

I guess the Spanish guy felt that he knew all about elephants, having done the African River ride at DisneyWorld where the elephants frolic charmingly along the river banks, rather than trampling people to death.

Afterthought:  phew, if the whole herd got in on the act as the report says, all that remained must have been some bloody mud with bone splinters, with pieces of El Stupido’s iPhone mixed in.

 

Stupid Is

Guy Stuff, Morons & Idiots

…and you know the rest.

I have to tell y’all, I am generally not a fearful man.  That’s not a boast, that’s a summary of my reaction to several (very) scary incidents that have tested me over my six-score years or so of adult life.

That said, if you told me that my next dare was to throw a water balloon at Danny Trejo, I’d back away whimpering and head to the bar.

I don’t care if he’s 80 years old.  I wouldn’t care if the lion you wanted me to tease with a stick was that old in lion-years, or assured me that the black mamba I’d have to kiss had been de-fanged.

Ain’t no way.   NFW.  Not Danny Trejo, no water bomb.

Yet some pendejo  did just that and gave Trejo the goods.

And was surprised when ol’ man Danny laid a big can of whup-ass on him.

Clueless

Marketing / Advertising, Morons & Idiots, Travels

Also in my Inbox, this time from American Airlines:

Bearing in mind that I live in north Texas and have pretty much all the heat I can handle (and more), which garden spots can AA be pimping?

#1:

It’s also known for its crime and tourist ripoffs.  Also, isn’t hurricane season just around the corner?  Pass.  Next:

#2:


Ah yes… NYfC in the summer heat.  Always a pleasure, in a place whose crime and ripoffs make T&C look like a bunch of complete amateurs — and that was before all the recent silliness.  As they say there, fuggeddabahdit.  Next:

#3:

In Texas terms, going to Florida in summer is described as “out of the frying pan and onto the gas ring.”  Thanks, but if I want heat and humidity, I can just step out onto my patio.  And finally:

#4:

Yeah, thanks.  If I want Mex street food, we’ve got a couple taco trucks that can be found the apartment parking lot every Friday and Saturday.  And… Aztec ruins, in Mexico City?  I thought the conquistadores  kinda leveled them.  But I could be wrong, as I may be wrong about Mex City’s crime rate.

Great promotion, American.  You utter dicks.