Category: Funny Stuff

Funniest Headline Of The Week

Funny Stuff, Journalist Scum, SHTF

From last Friday:

Well, if Black Lives Matter, Pink Pussyhats and Earth First members aren’t going to step up after a catastrophe, then someone has to.

And just a little note to the Daily Fail:  the Patriot Front isn’t a “white supremacist” organization, even though the Anti-Defamation League may think so.  (Irony Alert:  labeling the PF “white supremacist” is per ipso pretty much defamatory.)

Then there’s this:

Militia groups, such as Patriot Front, are reportedly using the devastating hurricanes to push a narrative about a failed or corrupt government hurricane response.

It’s not just “militia groups” who are calling the federal government’s response inadequate and pathetic;  it’s just about everyone who isn’t a Lefty asshole.

And we haven’t even started to discuss how the Fedgov’s agencies are blocking privately-funded aid and -supplies from reaching those ravaged areas…

Monday Funnies

Funny Stuff

Oh well… might as well start the weekly chores:


But you’re a true patriot if you’ve done both… on consecutive mornings.

And for the usual smut  light relief:

And the best possible way to show your opinion of Mondays in general:

And a final thought (prompted by the above pic):

FAFO

Crime, Law and Order, Morons & Idiots

I’m not a huge fan of the term “fuck around and find out” (or its past tense equivalent), meaning you wanna play games, you might not end up with the consequences you wanted.  I don’t know what the Brit expression of the above might be, but here’s a real-life example:

A marked police car was chasing after a [car driven by] men who were driving at high speeds through London before crashing outside Central Middlesex Hospital this morning.

Now that’s a lucky place to crash if ever there was one.  However:

A 17-year-old boy has been killed and a second is fighting for his life after the car struck a kerb and flipped over. 

The 17-year-old was pronounced dead shortly after the collision on Park Royal at around 5:25am. Two other men in the car at the time were rushed to hospital for treatment with their injuries first believed to be life threatening. One remains in a critical condition with the other now said to be stable but still receiving medical help.

A fourth passenger was not seriously hurt in the crash.

So the Gods of the Copybook Headings came through, in this case, because TANSTAAFL/Ride  (said Gods generally being the nemeses of the ungodly, as the ones dealing out the consequences.)

Of course, this being Britishland, there has to be An Inquiry, but I can’t see what for.  Little shits were driving a car (probably stolen, 2:1) and that recklessly through an urban area.  Had they collided with a pedestrian or another car, some innocent lives might have been lost.  As it was, nobody dead except those that should be.

Just this once, I’d like to be heading up the inquiry.  It would take about half an hour, and only that long because I’d order takeout pizza for everyone as we discussed the (very few) details before sending everyone on their way with no consequences for any of the cops, who were only doing their job, after all.

Of course, the parents of the deceased scrote(s, I’m hoping) will be all Weepy And Waily because their little Precious was a good boy who sang in the choir and they can’t imagine how he got involved in such Bad Company, and all the usual twaddle.  They should be billed for the replacement value of the wrecked car as a consequence for not supervising their still-minor child.  That they won’t be will just encourage similar negligence among other parents, unfortunately.

In case anyone has missed it, I’m not feeling in a very charitable mood today.

3 Modern Things I Have Never Done

3 Inexplicable Things

…which most other people seem to have done:

  • Used a car’s embedded navigation system.  (Okay, I did try — once — to use the Tiguan’s navsys, but gave up after three tries and resorted to the phone instead.  To be fair, the VW system was very clunky — 2013 era — so maybe it has improved since then, but now I just use the awful Waze app to venture to Parts Unknown because I became familiar with it during the Uber Years.  And New Wife’s 2015 Fiat 500 has no such thing on its spartan dashboard.)
  • Bought anything from TEMU.  (A lot of Millennials and Gen Z kids seem to love this Amazon-like thing, but that Chinese factory-direct-to-user model… I trust it not.  Plus long delivery times, especially when compared to Amazon, and from what I gather, returns are almost impossible — “not worth the hassle” seems to be a common statement, and with that renowned Chinese build quality?  Pass.)
  • Bought or used any Apple product.  (My purchase of an Apple IIe computer back in 1982 doesn’t count, because it was the only PC available at the time, and I only used it for 6 months before dumping it for an IBM PC.  But the modern Apple products like MacBook and iPhone?  Not one.)

Feel free to add your list of “never used or bought”, in Comments.