As any fule kno, I hate change, especially change which won’t necessarily improve anything. I also hate it when “change” is replaced by a euphemism such as “overhaul” — because “overhaul” to me means improving something or, at worst, restoring it to its original form or function after neglect. Imagine then my disgust at this development:
Overhaul of Augusta National ahead of the Masters is sign of the times as golf seeks to be the ultimate family sport
- Historic occasion for women’s golf on Saturday with first amateur Augusta event
- It was the turn of some of America’s best juniors to play the course on Sunday
- The club where nothing changed for decades is undergoing huge transformation
…and all the dreadful details are included in the link above. Several comments come to mind immediately.
Unless the something that has been going on for decades is genocide, institutionalized child molestation or South African-style apartheid, there’s no need to change anything. What has gone on for decades at Augusta National GC is a policy of men-only membership (only recently relaxed [spit] ) and a culture which creates a male enclave — and only to the most fevered feminist could this equate to the three horrors above. I know, wimmens are going to say, “It’s not that important; why are you making such a fuss?” to which my response is: “If it’s not that important, then why the fuck are you trying to change it?” I’ve written about men-only places before, and the benefits of such places where men can be unholy assholes without some woman or girly-man taking offense at their language / behavior. It’s a safety-valve for such activity, and I for one miss it terribly. I see nothing wrong with gender-specific institutions, whether female-only universities or, like Augusta, male-only golf clubs. (Don’t even get me started on military schools.)
So: why allow women to play at Augusta, when there are thousands upon thousands of other golf courses for them to play at? Pure symbolism, is why. (And I’ll bet these Amazon golferettes didn’t play off the back tees, either.)
Then there’s this crap about golf as the “ultimate family sport”? What the fuck is that all about? Let’s be honest: golf has always been a male preserve, except for the many lesbians who participate in the women’s tour and for the wives of male club-members who need to take a full day out of the week for a “Ladies Day” to get together and fuck around — don’t get me started on the double standard involved with that. (The truth of the matter is that male golfers prefer a Ladies Day because women play too slowly and pathetically, and it beats having to wait for twenty minutes per hole while Agnes, Pookie and Frances each take four or five shots to reach a green easily reachable in two by a pre-adolescent boy golfer.) And how can golf be the “ultimate family sport” when it bores everyone but the golfers involved to tears?
And Augusta’s decided to go along with this bullshit? Why? The Masters is already one of the most popular sporting events on TV, it’s already regarded as the world championship of golf by all golfers, and if even one of the tournament’s big sponsors decided to quit because feminism, other equally-large sponsors would get into fistfights to be their replacement. (The Masters allows for only a few sponsors and severely-limited advertising time, which is probably a prime reason why it’s so popular.) In other words, Augusta and The Masters are dealing from a position of strength, here, and — let me be quite blunt about this — they have no need to change anything.
But they’re going to, and that’s the pity of it. And if Augusta goes, what chance do any of the other men-only clubs have of continuing?
It’s enough to make a man have a double for his morning gin.