Imbalance

Ooooh I love this one:

White children playing Monopoly should be given more money and less jail time to teach them about racial privilege

Dumb fucks.  If they really wanted to teach White kids about some inherent racial privilege, the White kids should be forced to play the game with Black kids, only with half the money.

That’s assuming such an imbalance exists, of course (it doesn’t).

Or they could just play Black Monopoly:

Anyway…

Back when I was a student in the early 1970s, we played “Poor Man’s Monopoly” which featured all the things of regular Monopoly, only you started the game with no money at all, and collected only $20 each time you passed GO.  There was considerable hilarity, such as when it was your birthday and you had to collect $10 from each player (and were pummeled after forcing one or more players into insolvency).  Of course, you couldn’t borrow money from the bank (because what bank is going to lend you money when you have none to start off with, duh).  Obviously, there was no income tax ever paid, and some of the Chance and Community Chest cards were taken out because of irrelevancy.

The winner was the first player who could actually buy any piece of property — and believe me, those ugly brown cheap-ass suckers placed right after GO became a lot more desirable.

…or in British: 

Yeah, let kids play that game instead of that artificial racial inequity bullshit, and let them see what life is truly about — for both Black and White.

Human Interest

When people so often ask me why I read the horrible Daily Mail newspaper, I can point to stories like this one, which somehow always escape being covered by U.S. newspapers:

A grandmother and son embarked on a once-in-a-lifetime road trip in a vintage Caddy.

Annie Koehler, 79, and Jamie Hutchins, 60, completed the cross-country excursion last month – traveling 4,200 miles in nine days with the windows down. 

The duo traveled across the US — from Illinois to Santa Monica- – in a Cadillac he custom-made.

Despite dating back to 1957, the De Ville made it an astounding 4,200 miles in nine days, Koehler said in an interview – noting how the trip was all done with ‘the windows down.’

The retired trucker also said she needs a new set of tires – after making the journey at 90 mph and winning a couple ‘burnout’ competitions on the way.

Wait… she’s the “retired trucker”?  Could I love her any more?

Lemme tell ya:  among my several posts about doing a long-distance trip in an old car, I’d never have thought about having someone like her as a companion;  but I would now, in a heartbeat.  (But is there anyone “like her”?  I doubt it.)

And by the way:  4,200 miles in nine days, with a couple lengthy stops for the “burnout” competitions… you work out their average speed — in a rebuilt ’57 Caddy.

Fantastic stuff.  Thanks, DM — you made my day.