Tag: Foreigners

News Roundup — International Edition

Bad News, Disaster

No links because we Murkins don’t really care much for furriners.  I do this so you don’t need to.


…and as it’s China, let’s just go with a hundred-and-eight thousand, because we all know the ChiComs lie like Clintons.  And speaking of lying, this from the BBC:


…and I will give $10,000 to anyone who can provide irrefutable scientific proof that viruses can be teleported by radio waves… you fucking moron.


…good grief, the Italians can start opening up businesses, and we can’t?  And meanwhile, in the south…


…except they’re not Covidiots, they’re pissed-off mafiosi.  (In the old days. they’d just have sent someone round to visit the families of the chopper pilots.)


…I think we need to start a Berlin Airlift-style operation in eastern Greece, only we drop machine-guns instead of coal and food.


…that’s the spirit:  disarm the cops first, then riot.


…and you have to know things are getting bad when the servile obedient Germans are stoning their Polizei.  But at least they’re not getting out of control, unlike elsewhere:


…I think this headline should be printed out and distributed to the public at large;  and the next time some asswipe Californian cop gets all enforcey on someone taking a stroll along an empty beach, he should be given a copy.  Just as an FYI, of course.

Finally, some educational news:


…and unlike what you may have heard from Hollywood:  Krakatoa is west of Java.  Now you know.

Cheers

Disaster, Food & Drink

Of course, it had to be a German:

While appearing on “The Morning Show,” Dr. Rissland was asked about whether or not drinking alcohol could kill any viruses a person may have ingested. “Yes, of course, that’s true,” Dr. Rissland responded. “And the higher the percentage of alcohol, the better it is. For example, if you are a whisky lover, then that certainly isn’t a bad idea,” he continued, while offering this bit of sage advice to pace yourself:  “But of course you need to bear in mind that you can’t do that every 15 minutes, that is something else to consider.”

Speak for yourself, mein medisches freund.  Actually, I think a half-mouthful of Scotch every quarter-hour is a little slow — to judge by the normal spirits-intake rate of several of my friends (Mr. Free Market, Doc Russia and Mrs. Sorenson, to name but three), and mine certainly doesn’t rank far behind.

I think the good doctor shouldn’t confine himself to just whisky / whiskey;  he needs to publish a list of high-alcohol beverages, as a public service, of course.

Needless to say, the fuckheads at the WHO disagree strongly with his considered medical opinion.  But I ask you, O My Readers:  whose opinion would you rather trust:  a conscientious, methodical German doctor, or the idiots who brought you too-late-breaking news of the Chinkvirus?  I don’t think it requires that much thought, really.

The only question remains:  Scotch, rum or brandy?

News Roundup

Bad News

This week, a picture’s worth a thousand words (links in the pictures):


…you see, that’s the nice thing about being a sovereign nation and not part of some unelected supranational entity:  you don’t need to get permission from anybody when your own self-interest is involved.


…oh NOES !!!  No Aintree, no Train Smash Women!  How much more must we endure?


… nobody cares what you think, you washed-up old Marxist bitch.


…STFU, you stupid name-brand nobody.  As if anyone cares what you think, either.


…yup, there go the Commies;  always with the “experts” to tell us how to run our lives.  And Congress?  I’d rather put Steve Urkel in charge.


…make it “permanent”, and at least some good will have come out of this shit.


…no, no, you silly people, you shouldn’t be buying eeeevil guns:  why, the government will look after you and keep you safe — just like they do your families back in Wuhan.


…what’s even funnier is that most of his supporters will believe him.

And finally, one pic to answer another:

  …

Inexplicable Part Deux

Men & Women

I saw that the CanuckiPM’s wife has been diagnosed with the dreaded Wuhan virus.  I didn’t even know the little drip was married, so I hastened to see the evidence:

Wait… what?  Shome mishtake, shurrly.

She’s quite hot, in that bland north-of-the-48th-parallel way, and probably could have had her choice of Canucki-males.  But no.  This near-hottie did this:

…with this?

(Bernard Weil/Toronto Star via Getty Images)

Good grief.

Then I learned that she’s since had three children, all allegedly fathered by him.

As I said, inexplicable…

The Trouble With Cheltenham

Beauty, Sports

As the racing season gets underway in Britishland,  I can announce with some happiness that the first major race at Cheltenham doesn’t feature the usual assortment of Train Smash Women, as the clientele (various Royals and other toffs) are Not Of That Ilk, thank goodness.  Here’s a representative sample of yesterday’s Ladies Day:

And of course avid racegoer Charlotte Hawkins looked lovely, as usual:

Maybe the shivery wet weather kept the ladies in check, who knows?  And speaking checks, here’s Princess Anne’s daughter Zara (who, as a former Olympic equestrienne medallist probably knows more about horses than any other woman at the course):

But for those Readers who like me are impatient to see the Train Smash Brigade, never fear:  Liverpool’s Aintree will be taking place in a couple week’s time…

Inexplicable

Crime, Men & Women

Certain things in life cannot be explained, e.g.:

…and this:

…how this doofus ever became famous:

…and why people continue to believe that government-made levees won’t fail:

But in that set of of inexplicable things, this headline tops all of them:

Here’s what I don’t understand:  how the hell did this story ever get out?

Did the hairdresser brag about her feat on Faecesbook?  Were the hairdresser’s customers alerted to this man’s predicament by his muffled screams, and called the cops?

OR:  did this helpless victim get free (either by being released by his captor, or somehow breaking free by his own efforts)… and then complain about it to the cops?  What kind of man would do that?

And (if the newspaper account of this escapade is to be believed) even as the former were the case, why did the cops take him seriously?

Now if the hairdresser looked like this, then maybe I could understand it better.

…but once again, if the article is to be believed, she wasn’t that bad-looking (with the “Russian caveat”* in effect).

So… did this helpless sex slave think he was going to get his own back on her (so to speak) by shopping her to the cops?  If so, that worked out really  well for him, as he was tossed into jail for the action which got him into this predicament in the first place, and where he was likely to be raped again, only by men and without the after-sex reward of food, money and a pair of jeans.

Like I said:  inexplicable.

*the Russian caveat:  not all young Russian women look like worn-out Moscow street prostitutes, but it’s the safe way to bet.