If you haven’t seen the quiz yet, go there and read it first before you check my answer below the fold. Read more
Tag: Humor
Stuff that makes me laugh
Caption Competition #364
Your suggestions in Comments.
A Big Middle Finger To The Dept. Of Energy
Via the Goddess Diogenes herself:
We here at the Department of Energy wanted to thank you for being conscientious about your energy usage this summer. Your efforts haven’t gone unnoticed. As a token of our gratitude, we wanted to highlight all the small but powerful steps you’ve taken to conserve energy over the past few months—and…
…then it falls headlong off the High Cliffs of Sarcasm immediately. Read it all, but first I’m going to issue a standard Swallow Coffee Before Reading Alert.
(I meant to post this over a week ago, saving the link, but it fell through the cracks as these things do. Fear not, for despite my stupidity, her post is as timely as its original publication date. Enjoy.)
What Would You Do?
As a rule, I tend to avoid silly pop quizzes like the one below, because no matter how I answer the question(s), I always seem to end up proving that I’m actually a libertarian.
This one, however, is different.
Imagine you are driving home on a deserted road in a sports car in the middle of a stormy night. On your way home, you pause at a bus stop and notice four people desperately in need of transportation.
The next bus isn’t scheduled until the morning and you can only fit three of them in your car. You cannot bend the rules to allow you to fit all four in the car with you driving. For example, the child cannot sit on someone’s knee.
The test reads: You stop your car and meet the four people:
- A pregnant woman who started to have excruciating pain and looks like she’s on the verge of giving birth. She’s pleading to be sent to any hospital or at least be helped while going into labor.
- A young child crying and screaming because he/she wandered away from his/her parents and home. The child doesn’t know where his/her address is but knows the full name of his/her parents. He/she just wants to go back home.
- A surgeon doctor with his briefcase that contains his medical tools. He needs to go to his hospital as soon as possible in order to perform a very critical surgery.
- Someone who just wants to go home, but it happens that you already have known and met this person before. To you, that person is a very dear and close friend/love of your life/desired future spouse. It’s been a very long time since you have both seen each other. You’ve always wanted to meet this person again to reconnect and rebuild your relationship with him/her, and you can’t find a better opportunity to do that, because if you don’t take it, chances are that you may not have that opportunity again.”
Adding to the complications, you do not have a mobile phone so you cannot call anybody else for help, and there are no houses nearby to ask to use their landline. There’s no one else on the road to help them but you. The bus stop is located away from any public facilities (hospitals, police stations) and houses, so no one can take it for a walk, especially in this kind of time and weather.
What do you do in that kind of situation? How will you give your help and prioritize it for those people? Which one will you choose to be the first person to be helped? You have to think very quickly to come up with a solution for this predicament.
So, Readers: what say you? Give your answers in Comments. My response will be posted tomorrow.
News Roundup
Might need to have a toke or two after reading this news roundup…
From the Disaster Known As Government:
...one wonders, just out of curiosity of course, how the Blackhawk’s pilot would have responded if he’d started to take fire from the ground. Just idly wondering, of course.
...and just when you thought Catch-22 was out of date.
From the Education Department:
...keyword: Australia.
...now that’s overachieving, even for #Wisconsin. And… 11?
...no. Now onto our next item:
...she’s lying. I bet she doesn’t even know what Gen her alleged Glock is, never mind how to load it.
In Furrin News:
...maybe because they’re four times as likely to be criminals?
...bravissima, Signora Meloni.
...keyword: Mexico.
And now for some Truly Stupid News:
...oh FFS; next thing: Laundry SWAT? Oh wait; first: Banter Police.
#BritainIsDoomed
...young Romeo needs hanging.
...doesn’t matter; their fries have been shit ever since they stopped frying them in beef tallow anyway.
And in ever-link-free 
...fucking Disney has a lot to answer for.
And a quick visit to 
reveals:
...ahhh Alica Schmidt; the best thing to come out of Germany since the Mercedes Gullwing.
And that’s all the nudes news worth uncovering.
Monday Funnies
Oh well… might as well start the weekly chores:
But you’re a true patriot if you’ve done both… on consecutive mornings.
And for the usual smut light relief:
And the best possible way to show your opinion of Mondays in general:
And a final thought (prompted by the above pic):
