Tag: Humor

Brought to you by:

And on a related topic:

…no problem, Toots.  Ummm… who are you, again?

…why are we surprised by this?

…why does anyone even use this stupid card anymore? 

…

…key word, of course, being “Seattle”.

…MAKE ‘EM SQUEAL LAHK A PIG, Johnny-boy!

…thus coming down from “stratospheric”  to just “major ripoff.”

…so, how are those shuttered nuke plants working for you?

…yes they are;  we all hate you, and we’re united in our desire to vote all of you scumbags out of office ASAP.

…except that unfortunately, none of them will actually move.  For those who do, however… buh-bye.

…speaking of “louche”, aren’t you the dude who was caught wanking during a company Zoom call?

…meh, as long as she didn’t make it a class project…

…only ONE million?  Color me shocked.

And in no-link INSIGNIFICA:

     

Finally, this snippet:

…I should point out that the former Miss England has had something like five kids, so it’s not surprising that a little nip ‘n tuck was called for.  Aaaaanyway, here’s the (covered) body part in question:

 

I know she’s not that attractive now, but in her glory (pre-five-kids) days:

If you want to see her actual thingy, you’ll have to look for her “leaked” sex tape.  I ain’t gonna go there.

And on that note, we’ve come [sic]  to the end of the news.

Brought to you by:

And with that taste in our mouth, here’s the news:

…possibly because he’s not an actor?

…hence the constant need to augment our ammo supplies.

…I wanna hear the teacher’s side first, because some little shits deserve a good headbanging if the teacher has to resort to physically tossing them out the classroom.

…their gig, their dress code.

…clearly, not everyone wants to #BelieveAllWomen.

…and also their combine harvesters, planters and tractors.  This can only end well.

…and right on cue, here’s the bad side of the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade.

TRAFFIC WARDENS STRIKE THREAT
…clearly, a strike most people will support.

Dept. Of Irony:

…no doubt, his appeal will be granted because Britain.

…from the woman who gives stupid people a bad name.  Dumb bitch.

…we kinda did.

And you are going to be SO grateful for the lack of linkages in the next couple examples of INSIGNIFICA:

   

…just add money.  Guaranteed.

 

And finally, something to make you smile (with link):

And that, as they say, is that.

Brought to you by:

So let’s get down and dirty:

…wow:  you overwork and abuse workers, and then have problems getting fresh meat to grind?

…just doing what they’ve always (never) done.

…

…only whilst they and their ilk are still alive.

…because crime rages.

…you mean it’s a crime to burn Renaults, Peugeots and Citroens?

…the problem is that there weren’t enough smoking guns at Uvalde.

…excellent stuff.  More like this, please.  And in Massachusetts?

…the cynics might say that the best way to get inside the political elite’s heads is with a cleaver or a .45 bullet, but I’m not one of those.

…if by “repair” you mean using the above-mentioned cleavers and .45 bullets, then yes.

…for my Murkin Readers, smelling salts are available.  40%?

…actually, it’s to make people laugh, but I’ll take “offending” as a good second option.

…LOL.  He might be a good boss, but he’s still the boss.  Diss him, expect consequences.

…they should just use electric tractors. [/Biden Administration]

And in today’s INSIGNIFICA:

      

Finally:

Eugenie who?, you ask.

Oh yeah… that  Eugenie.

So much for the news.

Brought to you by:

So put them on, and let’s examine the news.

…only ONE inmate?  The Clintons must be having money problems.

…but you have no problem with states sharing personal data when it come to guns?  Got it.

And on the latter topic:

…said negotiator being none other than Texas Senator John Cornyn.  I’m sure that the thousands of blistering phone calls he got from angry Texans had nothing at all to do with his walkout.  And on that same note:

…don’t make any long-term plans for your future in the Senate, Bubba.

…ye gods:  I had no idea we were in THAT much trouble.

…okay, sweetie:  name ONE.

…that’s only relevant if his mistress had made that a pre-condition.

…couldn’t happen to a nicer shithead.

…“simulate”?  Where’s the fun in that? 

…and that’s enough of your party’s bullshit.  You start it, Bubba, and we’ll finish it.

…feel free to add the adjectives “Black” and “White” where appropriate.

…sure.  Start with the biggest offenders — China and India — and let’s see how that goes.

…yeah, I’m sure he’s going to get right onto that, given that he declared war on the energy industry as a candidate.

And in the “Who Cares?” department, a.k.a. INSIGNIFICA:

     

     

…and nobody cares, boo hoo.

And lastly (with link):

…the “business meeting” being no doubt with some “clients” at the docks during Fleet Week:

So much for the news…