Tag: Humor

Stuff that makes me laugh

News Update

Bad News

Brought to you by:

And if Chinese isn’t good enough for you, try this one:


…so no change from the ordinary for them, then.

From the Dept. Of Irony:


…and if that didn’t make you chuckle, we can’t be friends.


…well, you don’t want an amateur in that job, do you?  


…of “unknown causes”.  Uh huh.


…every time this old Commie opens his mouth, he reminds us that he’s a fucking moron.  Old age sucks.  Ask me how I know.


…I know, my index finger is twitching too.


…thus planning to drive away more and more people — I’m betting these assholes have shorted the stock.


…unless they’re White male students, of course;  then it’s open season.

Then we have the Pussification Chronicles:


…are you fucking kidding me?  That’s almost as bad as the next wussy…


…you might feel vulnerable;  I just want to punch you in the mouth, you fucking sissy.  You even have a celebrity endorsement.

Doing manly things, on the other hand:


…bourbon and razor-sharp axes:  always a good mix.

And as for INSIGNIFICA:

 


…just throwing this out there, but maybe it has something to do with the vasectomy he had two years ago?

I’ve always had a soft (okay, hard) spot for Keeley Hazell, for two very good reasons.  Here she is arriving as some function or other:

And then, some other pics, just to give you an idea:

 

And that, as they say, is all the news that’s fit to leer at.

Asking For It

Good Stuff

Bound to happen:

Authorities will not file criminal charges against former heavyweight champ Mike Tyson after he was recorded on video punching a fellow first-class passenger aboard a plane at San Francisco International Airport last month.

You have to ask yourself about the industrial-strength Stupid in a guy who decides to pick a fight with Mike Tyson.  In close quarters.  With nowhere to run to.  Without at least one gun handy.

Has to be a Biden voter.

Quote Of The Day

Funny Stuff, QOTD

After a bad experience while waxing her hoo-hah*, a Brit woman summarizes her experience:

“My fanny* looks like a bright pink newborn panda, but at least the hair is gone. So is my will to live and half the products in my bathroom, but at this point I’ll salvage a win wherever I can.”

Read the whole thing;  it’s like a Mr. Bean episode.

News Roundup

Bad News

Brought to you by:

I know, I know… but the news is still worse:


…Commie asshole.


…see below.


…don’t you just wish you could do that to the Antifa assholes without getting hassled by the fuzz?


…actually, the reverse is true, but of course the WH is going to get it wrong.


…would that were a literal event.


…it’s a common side effect from eating Tide pods.


…shut the fuck up, Carl.


…they call her “leggy” only because they can’t call her “breasty”.


…sounds about right.  Should be more of it.

Train Smash Watch:


…no link, nothing to see.  Oh, alright, but don’t say I didn’t warn ya.

And in INSIGNIFICA:

   

I know, I know:  pictorial proof required:

And speaking of the above, here’s Christine McGuinness:

   

Working Off Debt

Men & Women, Trades

Here’s an interesting little morality tale.

My wife slept with our mechanic to settle a £500 bill we couldn’t afford to pay

We’ve been struggling to make ends meet ever since my wife lost her job last year.  My salary won’t stretch to cover our food, rent and energy bills.  That’s why we’re £2,000 in debt on our credit cards.

So it was the cherry on the cake when we were told our car failed its MOT last week. The mechanic told us his repairs would cost us nearly £500.  To add insult to injury it was obvious he fancied my wife.

Panicking, I asked if we could pay in instalments.  While looking my wife up and down he cheekily suggested if we didn’t have the money he could think of another way we could pay.  He said we could think about it overnight. Walking away, I asked her what she thought.

Her answer shocked me: “You know I’d do anything for us, babe.”

So the next day my wife went to his house while I waited in the car outside — it was the longest 30 minutes of my life.  I consoled myself with the idea that she’d be hating this as much as me, but when she finally emerged she seemed defiant and said: “Now I know I’m contributing just as much as you.”

It broke my heart and I’ve only got myself to blame.  Now she thinks it’s the answer to all our financial problems.  She even suggested I could manage her diary of clients.  I’m worried she even enjoyed having sex with this mechanic.

Well, that’s one way of “taking one for the team”, innit?

I actually feel sorry for the guy, because it seems to me he’s uncaged a tiger — and it’s small wonder, when all the Brit newspapers are full of tarts making X thousand a month for showing off their bodies and doing the dirty on prostitution sites like OnlyFans;  and in truth doing nothing on SugarBabies different from Mrs. Debtfire above.

It’s always gone on, only now it’s out in public.

I just wonder how these people account for the revenue on their tax return… because if they don’t, it’s called “tax evasion”, and the collection agencies (I mean tax offices hem hem) of both the U.K. and the U.S. respectively take quite a dim view of it.