Tag: Humor

Stuff that makes me laugh

Peeve #564

Gratuitous Chick Pics, Two-Minute Hate

Among the several things about Modern Life that make me ultra-peevish is this thing about people walking around carrying drinks — water bottles, Yeti flasks, what have you — and I want to ask people (loudly) whether they think they’re going to die of thirst before they can get to the nearest tap or drinking fountain.  Mostly, this applies to women, the precious creatures, because Teh Experts tell us that We Must Remain Hydrated, Lest We Die.

Maybe when you’re crossing the fucking Mojave Desert, but not when you’re crossing the street in Dallas or Los Angeles.

However, let it not be said that I’m completely intolerant in this regard.  I am prepared, for instance, to make exceptions to my “Stop acting like a camel!”  gripe in circumstances such as these:

…although I should also point out that not all women seem to need that oh-so important drink in their hand every time they step outdoors:


…and of course, there are those poor things in obvious need of sustenance:

I mean, I wouldn’t want y’all to think I was that Krool & Hartless, after all.

But in all honesty, if you’re that thirsty, get off the street and find a place to assuage your thirst — and there are many of them, in cities all over the world.  Places like these:

It’s really not too much to ask.

Simple Solution

House & Home

Apparently these miserable folks are having their lives ruined by a bunch of pigs:

A group of rogue pigs have been causing chaos in a quiet village for months, according to locals, by digging up gardens and causing thousands of pounds worth of damage.

The animals have been raiding properties after escaping from a nearby farm. 

Although they are regularly rounded up and returned, the escapes keep happening — with more members of the intrepid herd breaking out and heading for the gardens.

Of course, there’s a simple answer to this pressing problem:

or even:

But wait… I forgot that this is Britishland, where this kind of remedy is apparently frowned upon, and pigs are more important than private property.

And if the above pictures didn’t make you drool, we can’t be friends.

News Roundup

Bad News

You’ll need a martini too, after reading this lot.


...hey, they’ll try anything to get Angela Merkel to commit suicide.

In Billionaire Tech Wizard News:


...what bullshit.  a.) he’s trying to get sympathy from Lefties for palling up with DJT, or b.) he’s just another delusional Lefty like Whoopi Goldberg.  (I know:  embrace the power of “and”.)  Although maybe this had something to do with it:


...it should have been $25 billion, which may have made the androgynous little asshole take notice.


...says the guy who wants to coerce the whole world into being injected with experimental vaccines, and who’s wasted billions on trying to eliminate Third World hunger.

And speaking of insane shit:


...have they not yet realized that the world has changed since November 2024 and this bullshit ain’t gonna fly?  On the other hand, keyword:  Pennsylvania.

Speaking of a changing world:


...you don’t say.


...in the list of Things To Worry About, this probably ranks well below “millions of badgers raining from the skies”.

From the Dept. of Education:

...or does this just mean that minorities aren’t such good students, have lower graduation rates and therefore need disproportionate assistance to compete with Whitey?  Discuss.


...thus joining all the other universities in the world.


...only one hundred?  Talk about under-achievers.


...should have kept it to a carefully-vetted dozen.  But, Floriduh.

And of all those things we call 


...and the happy couple looks kinda like you’d think they would:

And as we drive down :


...and she’s using pictures rather than text to get her message across:

And that’s all the news under the sun.