In keeping with the times, I thought I’d just share my preparations for the Black Swan / End Times / Kamala election victory [some overlap] :
Of course, there may be a substitution or two…
Tag: Humor
Stuff that makes me laugh
Monday Funnies
Some more on the topic of red:
And the same model:
And one last redhead:
And in the same vein:
Now get out there, and prepare to lose your soul.
News Roundup
I’m so old I can even remember that horrible shit. (The toothpaste, not the women.)
And speaking of unspeakable women:
...methinks you need to go easy on that breakfast wine, Nancy.
In Election News:
...I was hoping she’d pick ILGov Fatboi Pritzker, just for the comedy value. But this Minnesoduh Commie will do just as well.
...somebody remind me again: by how much was Hillary Clinton leading Trump at this point in 2016?
From mostly-peaceful Britishland:
...yeah, good luck with that. Ask the Aussies how that worked out for them.
...but those anti-Israeli “From the river to the sea” rioters? Anyone been jailed for those yet? Asking for a friend.
And in Health News:
…
From the Africa Wins Again news desk:
...key statement: “Some equipment from Air Base 201 was shipped out, such as weaponry, but other equipment was left behind.” Of course it was. We have so much shit we can just throw it away.
...and in an email Reader Mike S. asks, quite reasonably: “What fucking moron builds a resort hotel in Somalia?”
From the Dept of Education:
...pedo orgs have a hierachy? Who knew? Also: this time it’s not a female teacher. Amazing.
In Showbiz News:
...well, at least he’s half-right, which in Hollywood isn’t bad. Of course, to them he’s half-right, too — just not on which one.
And in the obligatory EVERYBODY PANIC!!!! section:
...Global Cooling Climate Warming Change©: is there anything it CAN’T do?
And now your favorite section, that of link-free 
...wives? and: 
…WTF is a “situationship”?
...not going to go there — unless, of course, she’s got Jeffrey Epstein’s client list.
...well now, let’s take a look at this alleged miscreant:
If she’s Colombian, why is she holding up a Swedish flag? Nemmind:
And that can wash that news right out of our hair.
Caption Competition #354
Your suggestions in Comments.
News Roundup
And on we go, with our ten shots of bad news…
...that’s only because these snowflakes haven’t been exposed to actual violence. I have some ideas that could fix that. A cricket bat may be involved.
And speaking of freedom of speech, we have some Mostly Peaceful News:
...you see, if you’re going to stage a mostly-peaceful riot in Britishland, you can only do it if you’re doing the pro-Palestinian/anti-Semitic, Green or LGBTOSTFU thing, where the cops look on benignly. If you’re protesting government immigration policy, though, the rozzers will stomp you.
And:
...and there ya go.
From the Dumbass Chronicles:
...trying to help a rattlesnake = trying to help a Communist; you’re gonna get bitten.
...and the best posting for this clueless moron would be to Australia, so as to raise the average IQ in both the US and Oz. (Also filed under “Nepo/DEI Promotion”.)
Some more Political News:
...an excellent point. The answer of “how?” is contained in the words “the media”.
[no link]
...and in the absence of fraudulent ballots, she’d be lucky to get as much as that. Hence:
Some Sporting News:
...and why not? It’s just archery without bows, after all.
In The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:
…
Finally, it wouldn’t be a Roundup without an obligatory Everybody Panic!!! entry:
...just another example of all the good that Africa brings to the world.
And in the tangle of 
...from Christian mom to OnlyFans houri, in other words:
And that’s it for the news.
Monday Funnies
So let’s exchange the shouts for a few giggles.
And now, some stuff to help you open your eyes on this Monday morning:
By the way: next week’s Funnies’ theme will be “All About The Color Red”. Try to contain your excitement.