Change Of Pace

It occurs to me that of late this here back porch of mine has been too preoccupied with political shit such as rioters in Portland / Seattle, asshole politicians [redundancy alert] , the Chinkvirus and in general, the looming end of the world that is 2020.

So today I’m going to ignore all that, and put up some posts that are so trivial, so inconsequential and of so little lasting value that you, O my Readers, may be excused if you leave immediately for Breitbart, Insty or whatever, shaking your heads in sorrow while saying, “The old fart’s gone Biden on us.”

Enjoy…

Zero Results

Online searches (e.g. with Google, Duckduckgo, Altavista, Bing etc.) that will result in “Your search did not match any ­documents” :

  • People who believe Jeffery Epstein actually killed himself
  • CNN viewers
  • Piers Morgan fans (from Jeremy Clarkson)
  • Academy Awards Show viewers outside LA and NYC

And after November 3:

  • Sane people who voted Democrat

Add your own contributions in Comments

News Roundup

Before you read Teh Headlines below, here’s a little pick-me-up.


looks like that “assimilation” thing is working well for the Krauts.


somebody explain to me why punishment for a crime like this shouldn’t include flaying before execution.


this is me, wearing Sarah Hoyt’s shocked face.


man, I didn’t know that Trump has 60 million campaign workers.


and I’ll believe that poll, as long as “Do you think Blacks are racist?” was one of the questions.


joins Mandela, far too late, in that great Murdering Bastards Club In The Sky.


who?  Oh yeah, the guy who’s going to lose an election by a larger margin than George McGovern.


let’s start more modestly by canceling stupid.


wrong as always, Rather, you lying Commie cocksucker.


the only thing newsworthy about this one is that it wasn’t Nicholas Cage.


I know, I know:  this item no good without pitchurs:

Not quite zero, but close.

Monday Funnies

Well, the weekend fun is over.

Now the cleanup begins, with a little humor to alleviate the drudgery.

And remember, if you see a helpless young lady stuck with a broken down car:

…her boyfriend is probably hiding behind the bushes with a gun.

5 Worst People In The News

…or, add this to the list of people I don’t want to see in the media, ever again, unless in an obituary.  The list isn’t ranked, for once, because I can’t decide which is actually the worst.

  • Mitt Romney, whose current disloyalty to his party makes me almost glad he lost to Obama
  • big-city Democrat mayors — no point in trying to rank them, they’re all equally dreadful
  • big-mouth Hollywood types (Alec Baldwin, Bette Midler, Alyssa Milano etc.)
  • Hillary Clinton;  you lost, you’re irrelevant and most people want you either dead or in prison orange
  • Johnny Depp and Amber Heard — you’re both as crazy as a sackful of cats tossed in a swimming pool, and if it were possible for both of you to lose, that’s how I’d vote.  Or I’d put the two of you in a weighted sack together and toss you into a swimming pool, come to think of it.