Tag: Sex Wars

Dealing with alien beings

And They Want To CURE This?

Health

Now I’ve heard everything.

Sexsomnia is a condition that causes people to engage in sexual activity while their brains are technically asleep. This can include masturbation, groping, sexual vocalisation and attempts to initiate sex with a partner.

Although sexsomnia is an uncommon condition, it’s unclear how many people suffer from the sleep disorder. It is believed to affect three times more men than women  [I bet it does  — K], however many people are unaware they suffer from the disorder; while others are ashamed to admit they have it.

Studies estimate that roughly seven percent of the global population experience it at least once, and many typically cannot remember what they did in deep sleep and many are ashamed of it.

Ashamed?  Of an involuntary condition?  What is the matter with these people?

Let’s be honest, here.  “…roughly seven percent of the global population experience it at least once”, and let us assume, as with most distribution studies of this type, that in a subset of that 7%, a vast number of these incidences are around the “once” frequency.

Which, in a global population of (say) 5 billion adults is about as close to zero as makes no difference.

In other words:  it ain’t gonna happen to you.

And if it does, if you’re in bed with (say) Paige Spirinac or Salma Hayek as opposed to Hillary Clinton or Nancy Pelosi (sorry), it’s more of a blessing than a curse.  Or with your wife or girlfriend, or any woman who, on experiencing these nocturnal gropings, is not going to accuse you of rape (for, lest we forget, an involuntary/unconscious act).

I leave it to my individual Lady Readers as to their response to this hypothetical situation — knowing some of them as I do, my guess is that they will greet excuses of “But it’s my sexsomnia!”  with scorn if not actual violence, bless ’em.

Or they’ll get into the spirit of the thing and joyfully participate.  [checks for pigs flying past the window]

The only reservation I have is with the research methodology.  No way has this been observed, so to speak, in a controlled laboratory setting;  rather, of course, it depends on respondents’ experiences and memories — and when it comes to les questions sexuelle, most people lie like Clintons.

So ignore all the above;  and if you do suffer from sexsomnia, relax and enjoy your problem.

Flipping Wonderful

Men & Women

Okay, now I’ve seen everything:

And the best part?  It’s a sex toy for men, for a change.  To see how it works, follow the link;  it’s kind of interesting.

I know, I know:  “Who needs it?”  “What’s wrong with the old Mrs. Palm and her five offspring?”  “That’s just perverted!”  “Don’t need it.”  “It’s too damn expensive anyway.”

I must confess that I’m not in the target market — even when I was young enough to be so — but I find it intriguing as hell.

But I’ll tell you something for nothing.  When I think back on some past experiences, I bet the Tenga Flip Zero Gravity is better than a lot of those.

Quote Of The Day

Feminazis, QOTD

From uber-feminist Petronella Wyatt, talking about feminism and its aftermath:

“One in ten British women in their 50s has never married and lives alone, which is neither pleasant nor healthy.”

That’s probably because one in ten women (of whatever nationality) is neither pleasant nor healthy herself.  And that rather modest ratio skyrockets if you consider just the feministicals, who are mostly scolds and harridans.

No man should, despite their mid-life realizations and wails.

Not-So Happy Ending

Health, Men & Women

As if women weren’t used to refusing sex because they had a headache… now it appears that they can get headaches after sex as well, with dire consequences:

Doctors have urged Americans to seek help for a little-known sex problem — migraines triggered by sex, known medically as coital cephalgia.

Bloody hell.  It was difficult enough before to get Madame to allow access to her Garden Of Delight, but now it’s going to be practically impossible, with this prophylactic refusal available.

Of course, if she really loved you…  just sayin’.

 

I Have A List

Men & Women

Speaking of demanding women…

Paloma Faith is reportedly back looking for love after she signed up to the celebrity dating app Raya.  The singer, 42, is on the hunt for Mr Right, but she won’t be settling for someone who doesn’t meet her needs.  Paloma has created a five point checklist as she set out the tough criteria her next partner will need to meet. 

Before we get entangled in that set of weeds, let me say at the outlet that whatever her “needs” may be, she’s hardly in any position to make demands of this sort.

For one thing, she’s not especially attractive to look at:

…and her figure, especially post-multiple childbirths, is not what I’d call much either:

She has a pleasant-enough singing voice, but her speaking voice is somewhat jarring, having that Cockney-street-urchin screech well to the fore.

Were I in her target market, it would be a strong pass.  No man should.

Great Excuse

Men & Women, Pussification Parade

Imagine how this little story would have ended, had the sexes been reversed:

A wife who stabbed her husband in the chest for falling asleep while she was talking to him has been spared jail after her victim told the judge the attack was a ‘one-off’.

Canterbury Crown Court was told how Deborah Stallard carried out the attack after becoming ‘irritated’ when her husband Barrie had appeared to fall asleep when she began talking about her life problems.

Mr Stallard required emergency medical treatment for the stabbing, but asked the judge at a sentencing hearing on Friday not to put his wife behind bars — blaming the violent outburst on her menopausal symptoms.

Oh sure:  the always-reliable “menopause” defense.

Note that she didn’t just prick him with a knife;  she stabbed him hard enough to be hospitalized.  That’s some kind of “irritation”, you betcha.

Of course, nobody’s talking about how she could have used other, less-injurious methods — e.g. shaking or even (gasp!) slapping the guy awake — but because Teh Change is involved, Madame is spared the consequences of her actions.

And by the way:  Barrie?  You’re a fucking pussified twerp.