Tag: Sickness

Well, That Wasn’t Any Fun

Health

Last night I suddenly developed the most excruciating pain in my lower abdomen.  Came out of nowhere:  one minute I’m searching for pics of Carol Vorderman’s extensive superstructure, the next I’m doubled up on the couch and moaning like a Democrat forced to sing the National Anthem.

So did I go to the ER?  Silly rabbits, I’m a MAN — of course I didn’t wimp out and seek medical attention.

Now before anyone starts yelling at me — especially those Readers of the Female Persuasion — lemme ask y’all this:

What if it had just been gas, somehow bottled up and unable to be released?  You’d feel like a proper Charlie if the ER doc were to look at your CAT scan, shake his head sorrowfully and say, “Take two Gas-X and call me in the morning”, with the unspoken corollary:  “What a total pussy.”  That was not going to happen.  So I waited overnight.

However, by this morning the symptoms had not abated — got worse, actually —  so I girded up my loins and went off to the local Doc-In-The-Box to get a CAT scan.  But the nearest one had closed down for good.  So I went to another one close to the apartment, and they were open but — their CAT scan machine was broken.

By this time, the combination of frustration plus pain in my gut — I was driving bent over like a Florida geezer — made me say “Fukkit!” and so I ended up at GlobalMegaHealthCorp LLC, at the other end of Plano, FFS.  I went in promptly at 9.15am, was seen promptly at 11.15am, had the CAT scan promptly at 2.30pm, and was on my way to CVS promptly at 4.05pm.

Which is why I always try to go the the little ER clinics for visits of this nature:  in, scanned, diagnosed, prescribed and out in generally less than 90 minutes.  If they’re a little busy.

Anyway, I suppose you want to know why I’m still doubled over in pain, waiting for the Blessed Medications to kick in?

Diverticulitis (non-complicated), treated with Cipro and some other antibiotic.  According to Doc Russia (who diagnosed me correctly over the phone while I was waiting in the ER room), I should feel better by tomorrow.

Let’s hope.  In the meantime, I’m debating whether to pop a Tylenol-3 (the one with codeine) to help me get through the night.

Of course, I’m also counting my blessings.  This pain could have pointed to something really foul like a hiatal hernia, appendicitis (even though I’m too old for that shit) or the Evil Cousin of diverticulitis, a perforated bowel (which can seriously fuck up your weekend picnic plans).  Not to mention all the other shit down there that can creep up on Olde Pharttes and kill us like a smackeroo-blurdy.  That part of the body is like a WWII German minefield, with stuff just waiting to kill you.  But it wasn’t any of that.

Oh, and one small piece of other news:  my weight has gone down from 265 to 240, in just under two months.  My goal:  Army weight (205-210), or maybe even less if I can stick with it.  Here’s me, in approved SADF browns, circa 1977:

So there’s that, which is good.

Missing Villain

Bad News, Health

Here’s a panic-button issue:

What’s behind the worrying rise of cancer in young people? After cases in people aged 25-49 rises 22%, experts are blaming processed foods, smoking, drinking and even pollution

They missed “climate change” in that list, but no doubt it will be added later.

Cases of thyroid cancer are also soaring among 15 to 39-year-olds, according to figures from the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation at the University of Washington School of Medicine in the U.S. Between 1990 and 2019 there was an 81 per cent increase in cases in this age group in G20 nations, compared to a 24 per cent increase in all cancers.

Despite my flippant tone, this does seem to be a problem, although it’s affecting mostly young people right now — Daughter’s fiance has just had part of his thyroid removed, not for cancer but for something else.

That climate change thing still needs watching…

Ending Stupidity

Bureaucracy, Gummint, Plagues and Poxes

…and about time, too:

It appears the Biden Administration has ceded to increasing calls for an onerous COVID vaccine mandate to end for international air travelers, along with federal workers and contractors.

Stuff doesn’t seem to have worked, caused possibly thousands of unnecessary deaths all by itself, and was the basis for so much governmental overreach and, in some cases, outright thuggery.

Good riddance, and don’t bother doing it again, no matter how scary the poxes and plagues look.  We’re not going to be panicked, or bullied, next time.

September Redux

Health, Plagues and Poxes

Basically, I have the same flu as I had back in September.  That should be of no interest to anyone here, except that blogging will be light and not very substantial until (I hope) after the weekend.

I’ll just be posting pics like this:

…and lastly this, from Alex Dawson:

Sorry, but there it is.

Mystery Solved

Health

…I think.

Having been pronounced in excellent health one day, to feeling like total shit the next, I was pondering:

“Quoi?”

Then I remembered that as I do every year at my physical, I’d got a flu shot on my visit.  Aha!

So my body, which is increasingly starting to hate me as I get older, obviously decided to teach me a lesson.  “Don’t trust me to take care of myself?”  it must have said, “I’ll teach you to have some Russian nurse* inject some strange lurgies without my permission!”

I have to admit, though, that given all the abuse and punishment I’ve subjected my body to over the years, it probably has a point.

If you want me, I’ll be lying huddled in my bed, whimpering.

*yes, she was Russian, with that wonderfully liquid Russian accent which makes you just want to drink vodka and flirt with her until you pass out.  I know the breed, unfortunately.

She might have looked like that, except she was wearing a paper face condom so all I could see were her eyes.  Which were magical.

Fact-Based

Lifestyle, Plagues and Poxes

I may have said it first, but Steve Sailer says it with data and stuff:

Fortunately, in the current global outbreak only three people outside Africa have died so far, none in the U.S. Hopefully, there’s something different between African monkeypox and Western gay monkeypox.

Of course, monkeypox in America and Europe is overwhelmingly being spread by gay men to gay men.

For example, in New York City, none of its 336 victims so far have been women, in comparison to seven who are listed as “TGNCNB,” an acronym new to me that stands for “Transgender and Gender Non-Conforming Non-Binary.” Similarly, in Washington, D.C., which has the highest per-capita infection rate in the country, not one of the 122 patients is a woman.

Of course, one cannot mention the unthinkable:

“It’s unclear if this version of monkeypox spreads sexually or through more general skin-on-skin contact, or, most likely, both. It might also transmit through the air, but, at the moment, it appears to usually take a gay bacchanal to strew it far and wide.”

…lest one is accused of homophooohhhbia, but let’s be honest and at least acknowledge that in this case at least, there’s an ironclad correlation between buttsex and homopox.