Tag: Things of beauty

Art, music, whatever

Off The Shoulder

Beauty, Grooming

In today’s post I’m going to sing the praises of an article of women’s clothing which alas seems quite unfashionable these days, whereas it should be as perennially popular as blue jeans:  the loose, baggy, off-the-shoulder sweater.  Here’s an example:

The wonderful thing about this garment is that it looks sexy:  that slightly impression of wantonness  coupled with (in some cases) a tantalizing glimpse of the breast whenever the lady leans forward makes, for me at least, a hugely-erotic sight.

It’s completely ruined by the appearance of a bra strap, by the way;  the whole essence of the thing is near-nudity, even under so large and thick a garment.

Now I know that Not All Women Can Go Braless… but actually,  a loose floppy sweater does an excellent job of concealing loose, floppy breasts, for example, so what would be unthinkable with any other garment top is not at all out of the question with a wide, loose-topped sweater.  Here’s one with a very loose neck:

In each of the above cases, the model has a fairly modest bust — but a larger one would make the garment quite sensationally sexy.

While I quite like the Victorian “below-the-shoulder” (i.e. both shoulders uncovered), it’s a little more overt (albeit also very sexy too):

…but this one is definitely reserved for the Young ‘N Perky Set because of its tightness.

But a big ol’ floppy sweater falling off one shoulder?

Have mercy.

 

From Pretty To Peculiar

Beauty

There’s this TV show called Love Island, where pretty young heterosexual things of all types get to hang around in seclusion somewhere and bonk each other.  (I may not have got this quite right, as I’ve never actually watched the poxy thing, but this seems to be what happens.)  After the season ends, the cast go on to make all sorts of money from endorsements and Instagram appearances and so on.

Nice work, if you can get it.

And to get it,  you need to be pretty, regardless of whether you have a pleasure pole or a love socket.

The men, needless to say, don’t do much to make themselves look more attractive to the women — ’twas ever thus, except for men of the Elton John persuasion — but the sluts women certainly do.  And of course, by today’s deplorable standards of beauty, a girl needs to have an ass of Lopez/Kardashian dimensions, and a face that… well, see for yourselves.

Here’s an article which shows Before / After pics of some of the girls’ faces.  Most of them are fairly plain, but one stuck out as particularly sad:

She went from being quite stunning to looking like a RealDoll.

Yes, that’s a RealDoll.  I challenge anyone to contradict me.

In describing my despair at our modern life, I often say that I’m just a 1911 man trying to live in a 2020 world.  And I’m not exaggerating.

Here are three famous Edwardian beauties (Gladys Cooper, Lily Elsie and Marie Doro).  Compare them (and their contemporaries) with the grotésqueries  in the above article, and I think you’ll get my point.

 

Not a stitch of cosmetic surgery anywhere.  And if you didn’t fall instantly in love with one or all of the above three, I don’t want to talk to you anymore.

Classic Designs

Beauty

Just about every sentient human being has their own set of criteria for what constitutes a “classic” design.  My own are fairly simple, in that a classic design:

  • should make everyone who sees it go:  “Ah yes!  That’s  _____________”;
  • must stand the test of time — people should recognize exactly what it is, decades after its creation or even demise;
  • should be universally recognizable even to people not familiar with the product or product category;
  • should be beautiful enough so that one might desire to own it or view it in person, even when you’re not quite sure exactly what it is.

I (and others) might not even care for the stuff, but the iconic designs nevertheless need to be recognized as such.  Here are some examples of what I’m talking about.

E-type Jaguar

Walther PPK (“the James Bond gun”)

The Eiffel Tower

Volkswagen Beetle (old shape)

Cartier (“Tank”) Watch

P-08 (Luger)

Austin Mini (old shape)

The Parthenon

Winchester 1894

Omega Seamaster

1965 Ford Mustang

Spitfire

Those are just the first ones that spring to mind — I used the “five-minute” rule to establish which, to me, exemplify the concept.  Yours may differ, so feel free to comment.

AOBTD

Bad News, Beauty

Now it’s Diana Rigg’s turn to shuffle off this mortal coil (or, as the title suggests:  “another one bites the dust”).   In an email to me, Mr. Free Market included this pic:

…and I’m fairly sure this would be how we all want to remember her.

R.I.P. to one of the classiest and sexiest Dames ever.

Kim’s Back Yard

Real Estate

Following yesterday’s post which mocked the British ideal of “dream garden”, here are my own (ranked) top ten desirable backyard features:

1. four-bay 25-yard air-conditioned indoor pistol range
2. 100-yard rifle range with back stop and shaded shooting benches
3. sporting clays area, with six or more stations
4. six-car garage
5. climate-controlled storage shed for ammo and sundry shooting supplies (maybe backing off one of the ranges) with a decent reloading setup inside
6. outdoor kitchen with both charcoal- and gas grills, including a bar counter
7. woodworking shop, e.g. Norm Abrams’s “New Yankee Workshop”
8. swimming pool
9. surrounding the entire back yard with a couple extra corners thrown in, a go-kart track which could accommodate grownup cars e.g. a Caterham 500
10. Guest house where my friends could stay for their (probably weekly) play dates.

Okay, the race track is possibly something of an overreach, but not necessarily.

As for the “garden” idea… meh.  Patio or deck with pool and BBQ grill, no lawn.  Pots with artificial flowers.

Practice Room

Music

If I had the money, I’d buy a house that would include space for a sound-proofed music room.  Then I’d load it up with guitars and a few amps, just to mess around on (when the weather’s inclement).

“Which guitars?” you ask.

Kim’s Top Five Favorite Electric Guitars

Fender Stratocaster

I like playing rock ‘n roll, and the Strat practically defines the genre.  Also in rock:

Gibson SG Deluxe

This version, with the triple humbucker pickups, still sounds better than just about any other.  For some reason, I just prefer playing it, over the

Gibson Les Paul

 

Don’t get me wrong:  it’s #3 on my list, and I’m a really fussy listener when it comes to sound.  And for a change-up in the sound, my #4 pick is the

Rickenbacker 350

That jangly, chime-like sound reminds me of the 1960s, and how bad can that be?  But assuming I wanted a more stripped-down, basic sound (and I would), there’s nothing better than the

Fender Telecaster

I prefer the Thinline semi-acoustic body, as pictured.

For a practice amp, I’d actually have two, the Fender Twin Reverb and the Vox AC-30 for that old-fashioned (but still wonderful) sound of my youth:

   

…and the Mesa Boogie Dual Rectifier, for the more modern stuff:

That’s about it, for guitars.

Now for my favorite noisemakers…

Kim’s Top 3 Bass Guitars

Rickenbacker 4001 (or 4003) S

Nothing compares to the Rick — not the Fenders, nothing — and frankly, I only need the Rick (as did the late Chris Squire of Yes).  But just in case I ever got bored (unlikely) and wanted a different sound, then:

Gibson Thunderbird

It has a sound unlike any other bass guitar (listen to any Wishbone Ash album), and played loud, it sounds like a wild animal growling.  Finally, I’d like a fretless bass — I used to play one occasionally when we wanted a “nightclub” sound for early evening sets in a restaurant setting, but the one I really want is the

Rickenbacker 4001 FL

Rickenbacker doesn’t make a fretless bass anymore (the fools) but I bet I could find a decent luthier who’d swap out the fretted neck for a plain one.  (I don’t need the dots — just plain maple like the one pictured, or rosewood.)

As for amps, I’d need only two, the Roland 120XL, whose COSM simulator would give me room to play with different amp sounds:

…or, if I just wanted to plug in and forget about fiddling about, then the wonderful

Orange AD200B, with the BC 115 15″ 400w speaker cab

While I like the versatility of solid-state / transistor amps like the Roland, nothing beats the sound of valves;  and I like the ability of 15″ speakers to push those deep bass notes (it’s all about pushing air, and a powerful amp and 15″ speakers get it done).  I never actually owned an Orange, only played a three-month gig with a borrowed one — but oh baby…

…just looking at all the above makes me want to play in a band again.

Anyway, I thought I’d put this up just so people could realize that this website isn’t all gunsgunsguns.  I have a gentler, more artistic side too.  And it was sparked by this article.